DESTINY’S BIBLE STUDY NOTES AND QUOTES

(The LIFE and MINISTRY of JESUS # 33)

The Foreshadowing of the Cross (See Matthew 16:13-28, Mark 8:27:-38, Luke 9:18-27)

Even before Jesus took humanity upon Him, He saw the whole length of the path He must travel in order to save that which was lost.

He knew the anguish that would come upon Him. He knew it all, and yet He said, “Lo, I come: in the volume of the Book it is written of Me, I delight to do Your will, oh My God. Yes, Your law is within My heart.” (Psalm 40:7, 8)

Although the baptism of blood must first be received. Although the sins of the world were to weigh upon His innocent soul. Although the shadow of unspeakable woe was upon Him. Yet for the joy that was set before Him, He chose to endure the cross, and despised the shame.

The vacillating course of those who praised yesterday, and condemned today, did not destroy the faith of the true follower of the Savior. Peter declared, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.” He didn’t wait for kingly honors to crown his Lord, but accepted Him in His humiliation.

The truth which Peter had confessed is the foundation of the believer’s faith. It is that which Christ Himself has declared to be eternal life.

Never can humanity, of itself, attain to a knowledge of the divine.

“The secret of the Lord is with them that fear Him.” The fact that Peter discerned the glory of Christ was evidence that he had been “taught of God.” (Psalm 25:14, and John 6:45)

“The keys of the kingdom of heaven” are the words of Christ. The words of Holy Scripture are His. These words have the power to open and shut heaven. They declare the conditions upon which men are received or rejected.

All are exposed to temptation, and are liable to error. Upon no finite being can we depend for guidance. The Rock of faith is the living presence of Christ in our lives, and in the church.

“Cursed is the man who trusts in man and who makes flesh his strength.” The Lord “is the Rock, His work is perfect.” “Blessed are all they who put their trust in Him. (Jerimiah 17:5, Deuteronomy 32:4, and Psalm 2:12)

Jesus began to show His disciples how He must go to Jerusalem, and suffer many things of the elders, chief priests, and scribes, and be killed, and be raised again the third day. This caused Peter to declare, “Be it far from you, Lord: This shall not be done to you.”

Peter’s words were not such as would be a help and solace to Jesus in the great trial before Him. They were not in harmony with God’s purpose of grace toward a lost world, or with the lesson of self-sacrifice that Jesus had come to teach by His own example.

The Savior was moved to utter one of the sternest rebukes that ever fell from His lips. “Get you behind Me, Satan: you are an offence to Me: for you savor not the things that be of God, but those that be of men.”

The words of Christ were spoken, not necessarily to Peter, but to the one who was trying to separate him from his Redeemer.

It was to Peter a bitter lesson, and one which he learned but slowly, that the path of Christ on earth lay through agony and humiliation. Jesus now explained to His disciples that His own life of self-abnegation was an example of what theirs should be.

To the disciples His words, though dimly comprehended, pointed to their submission to the most bitter humiliation, submission even unto death for the sake of Christ.

Jesus did not count heaven a place to be desired while we were lost. He left the heavenly courts for a life of reproach and insult, and a death of shame. He who was rich in heaven’s priceless treasure, became poor, that through His poverty we might be rich. We are to follow in the path He trod.

The Christian is ever to realize that he has consecrated himself to God, and that in character he is to reveal Christ to the world. The self-sacrifice, the sympathy, and the love.

“Whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose His life, for My sake and the gospel’s, the same shall save it.” Selfishness is death. No organ of the body could live should it confine its service to itself.

He Was Transfigured (See Matthew 17:1-8, Mark 9:2-8, Luke 9:28-36)

Jesus has often spent entire nights in the mountains praying. He who had formed mountain and valley is at home with nature, and enjoys its quietude. The disciples follow where Christ leads the way; yet they wonder why their Master should lead them up the toilsome ascent when they are weary, and when He too is in need of rest.

The Man of Sorrows pours out His supplications with tears. He prays for strength to endure the test in behalf of humanity. He must Himself gain a fresh hold on Omnipotence, for only thus can He contemplate the future. He also pours out His heart longings for His disciples, that in the hour of the power of darkness their faith may not fail.

Divinity flashes through humanity, and meets the glory coming from above. Arising from His prostrate position, Christ stands in godlike majesty. The souls agony is gone. His countenance now shines “as the sun,” and His garments are “white as the light.”

Moses upon the mount of transfiguration was a witness to Christ’s victory over sin and death. He represented those who shall come forth from the grave at the resurrection of the just. Elijah, who had been translated to heaven without seeing death, represented those who will be living upon the earth at Christ’s second coming, and who will be “changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trump;” when “this mortal must put on immortality,” and “this corruptible must put on incorruption.” (I Corinthians 15:51-53)

Heaven had sent its messengers to Jesus; not angels, but men who had endured suffering and sorrow, and who could sympathize with the Savior in the trial of His earthly life.

Jesus was clothed with the light of heaven, as He will appear when He shall come “the second time without sin unto salvation.”

The disciples were “eyewitnesses of His majesty (2 Peter 1:16), and they realized that Jesus was indeed the Messiah, to whom patriarchs and prophets had witnessed, and that He was recognized as such by the heavenly universe.

“A bright cloud overshadowed them: and behold a voice out of the cloud, which said, This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased; hear ye Him.”

As they beheld the cloud of glory, brighter than that which went before the tribes of Israel in the wilderness; as they heard the voice of God speak in awful majesty that caused the mountain to tremble, the disciples fell smitten to the earth.

They remained prostrate, their faces hidden, till Jesus came near, and touched them, dispelling their fears with His well known voice, “Arise, be not afraid.”

Venturing to lift up their eyes, they saw that the heavenly glory had passed away, the forms of Moses and Elijah had disappeared. They were on the mount, alone with Jesus.

DESTINY’S BIBLE STUDY NOTES AND QUOTES

(The LIFE and MINISTRY of JESUS #32)

Barriers Broken Down (See Matthew 15:21-28, Mark 7:24-36)

After the encounter with the pharisees, Jesus withdrew from Capernaum, and crossing Galilee, went to the hill country on the borders of Phoenicia. Looking westward, he could see the ancient cities of Tyre and Sidon, with their heathen temples, their magnificent palaces, and markets of trade, with the harbors filled with shipping.

Behold, a Canaanite woman came out from those borders, and cried saying, “Have mercy on me oh Lord, Son of David, my daughter is severely demon possessed.” (Matthew 5:22)

Christ knew this woman’s situation. He knew that she was longing to see Him, and He placed Himself in her path. By ministering to her sorrow, He could give a living representation of the lesson He designed to teach. For this, He had brought His disciples into the region.

He desired them to see the ignorance existing in cities and villages close to the land of Israel. The people who had been given every opportunity  to understand the truth were without a knowledge of the needs of those around them. No effort was made to help souls in darkness.

The woman urged her case with increased earnestness, bowing at His feet and crying, “Lord help me!”

Jesus, still apparently rejecting her entreaties according to the unfeeling prejudice of the Jews, answered. “It is not good to take the children’s bread and throw it to the little dogs.”

This answer would have utterly discouraged a less earnest seeker. But the woman saw that her opportunity had come. Beneath the apparent refusal of Jesus, she saw a compassion that He could not hide!

The same agencies that barred men from Christ eighteen hundred years ago, are at work today. The evil spirit that built up the partition wall between Jew and Gentile is still active. Pride and prejudice have built strong walls of separation between different classes of humanity.

Christ and His mission have been misrepresented, and multitudes feel that they are virtually shut away from the ministry of the gospel. But let them not feel that they are shut away from Christ. There are no barriers which man or Satan can erect that faith cannot penetrate.

In faith the woman of Phoenicia flung herself against the barriers that had been piled up between Jew and Gentile. Against discouragement, regardless of appearances that might have led her to doubt, she trusted the Savior’s love!

It is thus that Christ desires us to trust in Him. The blessings of salvation are for every soul. Nothing but their own choice can prevent anyone from becoming a partaker of the promise in Christ by the gospel.

Caste is hateful to God. He ignores everything of this character. In His sight, the souls of humanity are equal in His sight.

“Seek the Lord, in the hope that you might grope for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us.” (Acts 17:27)

“Whoever calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)

The True Sign (See Matthew 15:29-39; 16:1-12, Mark 7:31-37; 8:1-21)

Jesus would not send the people away hungry, and He called upon His disciples to give them food. Again, the disciples revealed their unbelief. At Bethsaida they had seen how, with Christ’s blessing, their little store availed for the feeding of the multitude; yet they did not now bring forward their all. Moreover, those he fed at Bethsaida were Jews; these were Gentiles and heathen.

Every miracle that Christ performed was a sign of His divinity. He had been doing the very work that had been foretold of the Messiah. But to the Pharisees these works of mercy were a positive offense. The Jewish leaders looked with heartless indifference on human suffering. In many cases their selfishness and oppression had caused the affliction that Christ relieved. Thus his miracles were to them a reproach.

That which led the Jews to reject the Savior’s work was the highest evidence of His divine character. The greatest significance of His miracles is seen in the fact that they were for the blessing of humanity.

The highest evidence that He came from God is that His life revealed the character of God. He did the works, and spoke the words of God. Such a life is the greatest of all miracles!

Enmity against Satan is not natural to the human heart, it is implanted by the grace of God. When one who has been controlled by a stubborn, wayward will is set free, and yields himself wholeheartedly to the drawing of God’s heavenly agencies, a miracle is wrought, so also when a man has been under strong delusion comes to understand moral truth.

Every time a soul is converted, and learns to love God, and keep His commandments, the promise of God is fulfilled. “A new heart will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you.” (Ezekiel 36:26). The change in human hearts, the transformation of human characters, is a miracle that reveals an ever-living Savior, working to rescue souls.

The disciples were inclined to think that their Master should have granted the demand for a sign in the heavens. They believed that He was fully able to do this, and that such a sign would put His enemies to silence. They did not discern the hypocrisy of these cavilers.

The hypocrisy of the Pharisees was the product of self-seeking.

Those who classed themselves with the followers of Jesus, but who had not left all to become His disciples, were influenced in a great degree by the reasoning of the Pharisees. They were often vacillating between faith and unbelief, and they did not discern the treasures of wisdom hidden in Christ.

Even the disciples, though outwardly they had left all for Jesus’ sake, had not in heart ceased to seek great things for themselves. It was this spirit that prompted the strife as to who should be greatest.

As leaven, if left to complete its work, will cause decay. So does the self-seeking spirit work the defilement, and ruin of the soul.

It is the love of self, a desire for an easier way than God has appointed that leads to the substitution of human theories and traditions for the divine precepts.

Only the power of God can banish self-seeking and hypocrisy. This change is the sign of His working. When the faith we accept destroys selfishness and pretense, when it leads us to seek God’s glory, and not our own, we may know that it is of the right order.

“Father, glorify thy name.” (John 12:28). This was the keynote of Christ’s life, and if we follow Him, this will be the keynote of our life.

He commands us to “walk, even as He walked,” and “hereby we do know that we know Him, if we keep His commandments.” (1 John 2: verses 6, and 3).

DESTINY’S BIBLE STUDY NOTES AND QUOTES

(The LIFE and MINISTRY of JESUS #31)

In Galilee (See John 6: 22-71)

When Christ forbade the people to declare Him king, He knew that a turning point in His history was reached. Multitudes who desired to exalt Him to the throne today would turn from Him tomorrow.

From the start of His ministry Jesus had held out to His followers no hope of earthly rewards.

If men could have had the world with Christ, multitudes would have proffered Him their allegiance, but such service He could not accept. Of those now connected with Him there were many who had been attracted by the hope of a worldly kingdom. These must be undeceived. The deep spiritual teaching in the miracle of the loaves had not been comprehended.

The fact that He claimed to be the Sent of God, and yet refused to be Israel’s king, was a mystery which they could not fathom.

Had they understood the Scriptures, they would have understood His words when He said, “I am the bread of life.” Only the day before, the great multitude, when faint and weary, had been fed by the bread which He had given. As from that bread they received physical strength and refreshment, so from Christ they might receive spiritual strength unto eternal life.

Christ appealed to those stubborn hearts. “They that come to Me I will not cast out.” All who received Him in faith, He said, should have eternal life. Not one could be lost.

Jesus did not explain the mystery of His birth. He made no answer to the questionings in regard to His having come down from heaven. Voluntarily He had made Himself of no reputation, and taken upon Him the form of a servant.

Christ became one flesh with us, in order that we might become one spirit with Him.

It is through the spirit that Christ dwells in us. And the Spirit of God, received into the heart by faith, is the beginning of the life eternal.

The manna in the wilderness could sustain only this earthly existence. It did not prevent death, nor insure immortality. But the Bread of Heaven, Jesus, would nourish the soul unto everlasting life.

To eat the flesh and drink the blood of Christ is to receive Him as a personal Savior, believing that He forgives our sins, and that we are complete in Him.

It is by beholding His love, by dwelling upon it, by drinking it in, that we become partakers of His nature. What food is to the body, Christ must be to the soul. Food cannot benefit us unless we eat it, unless it becomes part of our being. So Christ is of no value to us if we do not know Him as a personal Savior.

A theoretical knowledge will do us no good. We must feed upon Him, receive Him into the heart. His love, His grace, must be assimilated.

Is your zeal languishing? Has your first love grown cold? Accept again the proffered love of Christ. Eat of His flesh, drink of His blood, and you will become one with the Father, and with the Son.

Every soul is to receive life from God’s word himself. As we must eat food for ourselves in order to receive nourishment, so we must receive the word of God for ourselves. We are not to obtain it merely through the medium of another’s mind. We should carefully study the Bible, asking God for the aid of the Holy Spirit.

The word of God, received into the soul, molds the thoughts, and enters into the development of character. By looking constantly to Jesus with the eye of faith, we shall be strengthened.

Because they were too vain and self-righteous to receive reproof, and too world loving to accept a life of humility, many turned away from Jesus. Many are still doing the same today.

The consciousness that His compassion was unappreciated, His love unrequited, His mercy slighted, His salvation rejected, filled Him with sorrow that was inexpressible. This is what made Him a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.

While we cannot now comprehend the works and ways of God, we can discern His great love, which underlies all his dealings with humanity.

Compassionate Redeemer, who in the full knowledge of the doom that awaited Him, tenderly smoothed the way for the disciples, prepared them for their crowning trial, and strengthened them for the final test!

Tradition (See Matthew 15: 1-20, Mark 7: 1-23)

The scribes and Pharisees, expecting to see Jesus at the Passover, had laid a trap for Him.

As before, the ground of complaint was His disregard of traditional precepts that encumbered the law of God.

Whenever the message of truth comes home to souls with special power, Satan stirs up his agents to start a dispute over some minor question. Thus he seeks to attract attention from the real issue.

The questions that should most concern us are, do I believe with saving grace, and faith on the Son of God? Is my life in harmony with the divine law? “He that believes on the Son has everlasting life: and he that believes not the Son shall not see life.” “And hereby we do know that we know Him, if we keep His commandments.” (John 3:36, and 1 John 2:3)

Jesus explained that defilement comes not from without, but from within. Purity and impurity pertain to the soul. It is the evil deed, the evil word, the evil thought, the transgression of the law of God, not the neglect of external, man-made ceremonies, that defiles a person.

Every human invention that has been substituted for the commandments of God will be found worthless in that day when “God shall bring every work into judgement, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil.” (Ecclesiastes 12:14)

(WRITER’S NOTE: Bible prophecy is not just something in the future that we can’t really understand, or that has been falsely, and fictionally portrayed in popular books and movies. As a matter of fact, most prophecies have already taken place. We just need to understand a little history, as the last are getting closer to being fulfilled before Jesus returns. If you would like to understand what the Bible actually teaches about prophecy, here is some suggested viewing on YouTube: ‘Unlocking Bible Prophecies’ with Cami Oetman, and ‘Bible Flock Box’ with Greg Sereda.)

CXXXVII

WRITER’S NOTE

Dear Reader, thank you for your support! FYI, I will be taking a hiatus from writing stories. Whether it will be just this week, a month, or longer, I do not know. I’m praying for direction on how God would have me best use the time He has blessed me with.

However, I will still be posting ‘Destiny’s Notes’ every week. Once again, thank you, and may God richly bless you!

(DESTINY’S BIBLE STUDY NOTES AND QUOTES)

(The LIFE and MINISTRY of JESUS # 30)

Give Them To Eat. (See Matthew 14:13-21, Mark 6: 32-44, Luke 9: 10-17, John 6: 1-13)

Christ had retired to a secluded place with His disciples, but this rare season of peaceful quietude was soon broken. From the hillside He looked upon the moving multitude, and His heart was stirred with sympathy.

Interrupted as He was, and robbed of His rest, He was not impatient. He saw a great necessity demanding His attention as He watched the people coming and still coming. He “was moved with compassion toward them, because they were as sheep not having a shepherd.”

Jesus had labored all day without food or rest. He was pale from weariness and hunger, and the disciples besought Him to cease from His toil. But He could not withdraw Himself from the multitude that pressed upon Him.

Turning to Philip, He asked, “Where shall we buy bread, that these may eat?” This He said to test the faith of the disciple.

It was humble food that was provided. The fishes and barley loaves were the daily meals of the fisher folk about the Sea of Galilee. Selfishness and the indulgence of unnatural taste have brought sin and misery into the world. From excess on the one hand, and from want on the other. Christ taught them in this lesson that the natural provisions of God for man had been perverted.

God has promised that which is far better than worldly good, the abiding comfort of His own presence.

After the multitude had been fed, there was an abundance of food left. But He who had all the resources of infinite power at His command said, “Gather up the fragments that remain, that nothing be lost.”

These words meant more than putting the bread into the baskets. The lesson was twofold. Nothing is to be wasted. We are to let slip no temporal advantage. We should neglect nothing that will tend to benefit a human being.

How often our hearts sink, and faith fails us, as we see how great is the need, and how small the means in our hands. Like Andrew looking upon the five barley loaves and two little fishes, we exclaim, “What are they among so many?”

Often we hesitate, unwilling to give all that we have, fearing to spend and be spent for others. But Jesus has bidden us, “Give them to eat.” His command is a promise. And behind it is the same power that fed the multitude beside the sea.

Christ is the great center, the source of all strength. His disciples are to receive their supplies from Him. The most intelligent, the most spiritually minded, can bestow only as they receive. Of themselves they can supply nothing for the needs of the soul.

Successful work for Christ depends not so much on numbers or talent as upon pureness of purpose, the true simplicity of earnest, dependent faith.

So when you are surrounded by souls in need, know that Christ is there with you.

The miracle of the loaves appealed to everyone in the vast multitude. In the days of Moses, God had fed Israel with manna in the desert. Who was this that fed them that day but He whom Moses had foretold?

(Night On The Lake)

(See Matthew 14:22-33, Mark 6:45-52, John 6:14-21)

When left alone, Jesus went up into a mountain apart to pray. For hours He continued pleading with God. Not for Himself but for men were those prayers. The Savior knew that His days of personal ministry on earth were nearly ended.

In travail and conflict of soul He prayed for His disciples. They were to be grievously tried. Their long cherished hopes, based on popular delusion, were to be disappointed in a most painful and humiliating manner. In the place of exaltation to the throne of David they were to witness His crucifixion.

This was to be indeed His true coronation. But they did not discern this, and in consequence strong temptations would come to them.

Without the Holy Spirit to enlighten the mind and enlarge the comprehension, the faith of the disciples would fail. It was painful to Jesus that their conceptions of His kingdom were, to so great a degree, limited to worldly aggrandizement and honor.

On the lake, the disciples thoughts were stormy and unreasonable. The Lord gave them something else to afflict their souls and occupy their minds. God often does this when men create burdens and troubles for themselves.

Already danger was fast approaching. A violent tempest was stealing upon them, and they were unprepared for it. Jesus had not forgotten them. The Watcher on the shore saw those fear stricken men battling with the tempest. Not for a moment did He lose sight of His disciples.

When their hearts were subdued, their unholy ambition quelled, and in humility they prayed for help, it was given them.

A gleam of light reveals a mysterious figure walking on the water, and they soon realized it was Jesus. Peter, beside himself with joy, asks to join Jesus on the water. But taking his eyes off of Him, he sinks and nearly loses his life. But Jesus takes his hand and rescues him.

When trouble comes upon us, how often we are like Peter! We look upon the waves, instead of keeping our eyes fixed upon the Savior.

He does not call us to follow Him, and then forsake us!

Jesus desired to reveal to Peter his own weakness, to show that his safety was in constant dependence upon divine power. Amid the storms of temptation, he could walk safely only as in utter self-distrust he should rely upon the Savior.

It is the daily test that determines our victory or defeat in life’s great crisis. Those who fail to realize their constant dependence upon God will be overcome by temptation.

Only through realizing our own weakness and looking steadfastly unto Jesus can we walk securely.

TRICKY TRIANGLE

EPILOGUE

BROCK STORM

“Thanks for meeting me,” greeted my cousin, Dr. Hailey Storm, when I joined her at a coffee shop.

“No problem,” I said with a hesitant smile.

She ordered a coffee that looked more like a milkshake, and I got a sparkling water. After we sat, she began to twist a napkin nervously. She repeated, “Thanks for coming.”

“No problem,” I replied a second time. “Is everything alright with your parents?”

“Funny you should ask,” she replied with a humorless chuckle. “I mean, they’re doing as well as we could hope. Mom’s rehab is progressing nicely, and Dad is maintaining.”

I knew her mom and dad, my Uncle Hal and Aunt Dawn, had recently taken up residence in a nursing home. Her mother had a severe stroke, while her father has Alzheimer’s.

“That’s good,” I smiled encouragingly. “So why is it funny I should ask then?”

“Well,” she said with a wince. “Now that we’re here, together, I don’t know how to put this.”

“Put what?”

“Brock, do you remember the summer of 2003?”

I felt myself tense. How do you forget having the hots for someone forbidden? How do forget that your cousin was your first love?

“Of course I do.”

“In particular, do you remember the last time we fished together?”

“How could I forget?” I replied, laughing without humor. Now I twisted nervously at a napkin.

“We sure started down a dangerous path back then, didn’t we?” she asked me earnestly.

“I suppose we did,” I replied. “But we came to our senses and got off that path.”

“What if we weren’t cousins?”

“Huh?” I frowned, not understanding what she was getting at.

“If we weren’t cousins, would you have wanted me?”

“Wanted you how?”

“You know,” she smiled shyly. “Would you have wanted us to be boyfriend, girlfriend?”

“Are you kidding? In a heartbeat.”

She stared at me with a solemn expression. “We’re not blood cousins.”

“Huh?” I responded dumbly.

“I was going through some old family photos,” she explained. “Some hidden family photos. They caused me to question my parentage. I confronted my mother, and she confirmed my suspicions.”

“So… You were adopted?”

She shook her head. “Do you remember Ed Parker?”

“Sure I do. He’s that family friend that you always called Uncle Eddie.”

“Right, well, turns out, he and my mom had a brief fling.”

Her gaze was somber as she let me do the concluding.

“So Uncle Eddie was actually Papa Eddie?”

She nodded.

“But you didn’t know?”

She shook her head.

“I don’t know what to say,” I replied. “I don’t even know what to think. The little bit I was around Uncle Hal and Ed, they seemed to get along just fine.”

“That’s the weird thing,” Hailey shrugged. “They truly did get along great. I suppose if Uncle Eddie was involved in my life, and there was animosity between he and my father, I might have suspected.”

“You still think of him as Uncle Eddie?”

“Of course. And dad is dad. But what about us?”

“What do mean?”

“Brock, you ruined me for other guys!”

This stunned me. I felt rebuked, but I didn’t know why. My cousin Hailey and I did have a major thing for each other. But we were young, naïve, and we didn’t have sex. So how could I have ruined her? We did kiss passionately for a few minutes, but it was reciprocal, and I was the one that put the brakes on. “Look, I don’t know what else to say but sorry, I…”

“No, Brock, that came out wrong,” she interrupted, covering a delicate hand over my rough hand. “What I meant is that all the guys I’ve dated, I subconsciously compared to you, and nobody has ever met up to the standard I set up in my mind.”

“Uh oh,” I grinned. “You seem to be getting into shrink stuff.”

“Sorry,” she laughed, removing her hand from mine. “What I’m saying, though, is an indirect compliment. Besides, it’s not just that. I have always been a bit of a workaholic. I guess the combination is why I’m in my mid-thirties, and not only single, but never even had a steady boyfriend.”

“Wow,” I replied, half to myself in amazement.

“Wow what?” Hailey inquired, a hint of paranoia in her eyes.

“Oh, I just didn’t know that,” I said. “I mean, I knew you never married. But I never would have guessed somebody as beautiful and smart as you never had a boyfriend.”

“Thanks,” she said with a sentimental smile and a shrug.

“If it’s any consolation, you did the same thing to me until I was in my thirties. But then I met Dee, and her beauty and character are on par with yours.”

Hailey smirked and shook her head.

“What?” I inquired.

“God is so good, and works in mysterious ways.”

“I agree, but could you be more specific?”

“I read the e-book ‘Knight-Storm’ by Johnathan Embers,” she replied. “I know Destiny is a former porn star, that barely graduated high school. I spent more than half a decade in college achieving a doctorate. Yet Destiny’s ministry to women has had a bigger impact than my little practice.”

“You don’t know that. You’re comparing apples with oranges.”

She shrugged. “You said you were in a similar situation to me until you met Destiny.”

“Yeah.”

“What about that FBI agent, Nora Medora? Weren’t you two an item for eight years?”

I winced. “Nora and I had a complex relationship. She and I were together before I found God. We were more like friends with benefits if you know what I mean.”

“I’m a psychologist,” she said with a playful grin. “I know what you mean. But my question is, did you love her?”

“I did, but it’s complicated. You know the old adage, if you want friends, show yourself friendly?”

“Sure.”

“Well, it’s like that. Nora has always been married to her job. And I’ve never known a woman so cold and emotionless. To be blunt, she’s not a very loving person so she was hard to love. Great cop, not a great lover.”

“So why were you with her so long?”

“It goes back to what we talked about a before. I wasn’t meeting women that compared to you, so I didn’t want a real relationship. But Nora was physically attractive, and we had an agreement to be exclusive with each other, in a purely physical relationship. That way we both had no worries about STD’s.”

She scrunched her cute little nose in disgust. It occurred to me, and not for the first time, that my initial attraction to Destiny was because she looked so similar to Hailey. She said with a little laugh. “I guess that was TMI.”

“But you’re a shrink, surely you’ve heard worse?”

She shrugged. “I have, but not from the lips of my dream guy.”

The hairs on my neck prickled, because I could relate to how she felt, and we were cousins. Yet, now it seemed we weren’t. Yet we still were. Life is complex!

“Can I ask you a TMI question?” I asked.

“Okay,” Hailey drawled hesitantly.

“You’re a committed Christian, yet you haven’t married. So, have you ever, you know, had sex?”

She shook her head.

I nodded. “I have another question. That summer day in the fishing boat. If I would have pursued rather than dissuaded, what would you have done?”

“I’d like to think I would have stopped us, but I honestly don’t know. I was a teenage girl with wild emotions, and obsessed with a guy I wanted to please.”

I felt an inappropriate twinge, and the need to get to the heart of the matter. “Hailey, what is it that you want from me today? I don’t mean to sound crass, but I’m happily married, so, as fond as I am of you, us not being blood cousins is irrelevant.”

“Oh, I know,” she said with wide eyes. “I guess by wanting to get together, I wanted complete closure with what happened between you and me. I mean, I thought I had closure years ago, but this whole parentage thing opened it back up. I guess I was just curious how you felt about the whole thing, and I wanted to pick your brain a little.”

“Yeah, well, it’s hard to say,” I replied. “I was such a different person twenty years ago. I honestly don’t know how I would have responded. My best guess is that I probably would have pursued sex with you, and went from there. Yet you just said you might have stopped that direction.”

She smiled sadly. “It’s been said that an unexamined life isn’t worth living. Yet sometimes when you examine it, you come up with even more unknowns.”

“Are you angry with your parents?”

“I was at first, but I understand my Mom’s reasons for wanting to keep it a secret. I don’t approve of the deceptive aspect, though. But that’s her choice, her sin.”

“But you were the one most directly affected.”

She shrugged. “Actually, I feel like Uncle Eddie was most affected. He knew the truth and loved me immensely, yet he had to distance himself from his true identity as my father.”

“I’d like to know how Uncle Hal not only forgave, but then allowed Ed to be such a huge part of your families lives. I mean were they truly best friends, or were they just amazing actors?”

“They were genuine friends. Trust me, I grew up with them.”

“Was there any family strife I wasn’t aware of?”

“No, I mean there were typical trials, but overall I grew up in an atmosphere of love and laughter.”

“That’s amazing, you ought to write a book.”

“Not me.”

“I have an idea, why not have your cousin Seven tell it on his podcast?”

“He’s your cousin too,” Hailey laughed.

“I don’t like to admit that,” I chuckled.

“Brock!” Hailey scolded.

“No, no, I’m kidding. I love our cousin, I just haven’t always liked him.”

Hailey laughed. “I tell you what. I’ll share this story with him if our little love story can be part of it.”

I felt my toes curl. But I knew by our conversation, that the what if of ‘us’ was a big struggle for her after she discovered her parent’s deception. But to me whether we would have or wouldn’t have pursued a relationship was irrelevant. We can’t go back in time, and besides, I’m deeply in love with my wife and wouldn’t even want to.

But whereas Hailey is a very reflective person, I’ve never been much of a rearview mirror type of guy. So for my cousin who I now simply loved as a sister in Christ, I said ‘Yes.’

(DESTINY’S BIBLE STUDY NOTES AND QUOTES)

(The LIFE and MINISTRY of JESUS #29)

Come Rest Awhile (See Matthew 1, 2, 13, Mark 6:30-32, Luke 9:7-10)

On returning from their missionary tour, the apostles gathered themselves together with Jesus, and told Him all things, both what they had done, and what they had taught. And He said to them, “Come aside by yourselves… And rest a while.”

While the disciples had been absent on their missionary tour, Jesus had visited other towns and villages, preaching the gospel of the kingdom. It was about this time that He received tidings of John the Baptist’s death.

This event brought vividly before Him the end to which His own steps were tending. The shadows were gathering thickly about His path. Priests and rabbis were watching to compass His death, spies hung upon His steps, and on every hand plots for His ruin were multiplying.

With saddened hearts the disciples of John had carried away his mutilated body to its burial. Then they went and told Jesus. These disciples had been envious of Christ when He seemed to be drawing the people away from John. They had sided with the pharisees in accusing Him when he sat with the publicans at Matthew’s feast. They had doubted His divine mission because He did not rescue the Baptist from death. But now that their teacher was dead, and they longed for consolation in their great sorrow, and for guidance as to their future work, they came to Jesus, and united their interests with His. They too needed a season of quiet for communion with the Savior.

The rest which Christ and His disciples took was not self-indulgent rest. The time they spent in retirement was not devoted to pleasure seeking. They talked together regarding the work of God, and the possibility of bringing greater efficiency to the work.

Like the disciples, we are in danger of losing sight of our dependence on God, and seeking to make a savior of our activity. We need to look constantly to Jesus, realizing that it is His power which does the work.

No other life was so crowded with labor and responsibility as was that of Jesus; yet how often He was found in prayer! How constant was His communion with God!

In a world of sin Jesus endured struggles and torture of soul. In communion with God He could unburden the sorrows that were crushing Him. Here He found comfort and joy. In Christ the cry of humanity reached the Father of infinite pity.

Through continual communion He received life from God, that He might impart life to the world. His experience is to be ours.

The silence of the soul makes more distinct the voice of God.

“Be still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10. Here alone can true rest be found.

Amid the hurrying bustle and the strain of life’s intense activities, the soul that is thus refreshed will be surrounded with an atmosphere of light and peace. The life will breathe out fragrance, and will reveal a divine power that reach people’s hearts.

TRICKY TRIANGLE

CHAPTER 15

DR. HAILEY MAY STORM

I was surprised, but not shocked, when at the age of thirty-five, I was going through some family pictures and saw ‘Uncle Eddie’ holding me right after I was born. I was curious girl. I had always wondered why a friend of my parents was so devoted to me, while at the same time seeming to keep his love for me on the down low.

I wondered why I had blonde hair and blue eyes like ‘Uncle Eddie,’ but my mother and father had dark hair and brown eyes. But then, I knew how babies were made. It would have taken an affair for Eddie to be my dad. But the man I knew as my father was genuinely close with ‘Uncle Eddie.’ Guys just wouldn’t be that way if some sort of love triangle was involved. Or would they?

I loved ‘Uncle Eddie,’ my biological father, with all my heart. Not because he spoiled me. He was kind and gentle, despite being a valiant warrior, a former Marine, and a distinguished police officer.

A year and five days after he had knelt with me, prayed, and given his heart back to the Lord Jesus, ‘Uncle Eddie,’ my second dad, passed away from lung cancer. He was fifty years old. It was then, at the age of eleven, that I discovered grief could make you physically ill.

It was this mental torment, coupled with ‘Uncle Eddie’s encouragements of my counseling abilities, that led to my pursuit of healing the mind and soul. This resulted with me achieving a doctorate in psychology. Uncle Eddie was the first person to call me Dr. Hailey May Storm a decade and a half before I actually earned it.

There are so many contradictions in a person’s life. Nothing has taught me that more than my job as a psychologist, with the exception of my own life. Is there such a thing as a sin of omission? I believe there is.

I love my mother and father immensely. But letting me grow up believing a lie was just plain wrong. However, I shouldn’t complain since I had a wonderful childhood. I was taught Bible truths that led to old fashioned values. I just had one snag, a secret, that if known would have been a disgrace. My own cousin, Brock Storm, was my first romantic love. The truth is, we were briefly kissing cousins.

I was thirteen when I first developed a crush on Brock. I know this because he is three years older than me, and he had just gotten his driver’s license. At a family gathering, he asked me if I wanted to go for a drive. I said ‘sure’ and off we went in his dad’s four wheel drive pickup.

I felt so cool tooling around town with Brock. He had already developed a reputation as not only a tough guy, but thee tough guy in our neck of the woods. He was always so quiet and mysterious that people were afraid of him. So I felt privileged when he started asking me about myself. What I wanted to be, what I liked to do.

We would only see each other occasionally over the next couple of years. But then something happened when I was a freshman and Brock was a senior. I wasn’t interested in sports, and I declined invitations to become a cheerleader. Instead my friends were book nerds like me.

One boy in particular, Clayton Tatum, was part of our little group of friends. He was a gangly, clumsy nerd with a long narrow nose that his glasses constantly slid down. One day he was walking through the school parking lot reading a textbook, when he dropped it, hitting the bumper of a senior’s car. It did no harm whatsoever to the vehicle, but it elicited the rath of Todd Emerson, the owner. He and his group of hoodlums began harassing Clay after that. They even gave him the moniker Gay Clay.

One day after Clay and I left a class we had together, Emerson came up behind him and knocked his notebook out of his hand. Papers scattered as Emerson and his cronies cackled. I knelt with Clay and helped him retrieve his papers. The next thing I knew Brock was there, bending over and picking up a paper, handing it to Clay.

Emerson had stopped a couple class rooms up where a half dozen guys talked and laughed. Brock eyed them coolly, then turned to Clay. “Go up and knock Emerson’s book out of his hands.”

Clay’s eyes widened, and he shook his head. With a trembling voice he said, “I can’t do that.”

“Yeah, you can,” Brock grinned. “I’ll be with you, you won’t get hurt, I promise.”

Clay glanced nervously at me. I almost couldn’t contain the excitement I felt. But I calmly told Clay, “Brock’s my cousin. If he says you won’t you won’t get hurt, you won’t get hurt. And this will likely stop the bullying.”

“This wasn’t an isolated event?” Brock asked with an arched eyebrow.

“Emerson picks on him all the time,” I told Brock. “Calls him Gay Clay.”

“Come on,” Brock insisted, taking Clay by the arm. “If he doesn’t leave you alone after our encounter, you let me know.”

You should have seen the look on Emerson’s face when Clay knocked his book from his grasp. First there was surprise, then shock when he saw what Clay had done. Then anger, quickly followed by fear, when he realized Brock was not just spectating, but accompanying Clay.

“Deck him, Todd,” one of Emerson’s friends instigated. Brock yanked a book bag off the friend’s shoulder and flung it. “Hey, I did nothing to you.”

“And Clay did nothing to Emerson, or any of you,” Brock replied with a menacing calm.

“Look man, I got no beef with you,” Emerson told Brock.

“Oh yes, you do,” Brock replied sternly. “Clay is a friend of Hailey Storm. She’s my cousin, and any friend of hers is a friend of mine.”

Something dawned on Emerson’s face. He didn’t even know my name was Hailey, let alone Storm. But everyone knew Brock. Forgive me, but I felt a sudden surge of pride, coupled with justice. My jaw clenched, and I crossed my arms, glaring at Emerson. He looked away.

“Come on, guys,” Emerson said, and began to walk off.

Brock grabbed him by the shirt collar and yanked him back. You could fabric tearing. “Did I say you could leave?”

“What’s going on here?” a teacher barked.

“If I hear that you even look at Clay wrong, next time I won’t be so nice,” Brock warned Emerson.

“Let’s break this up!” the teacher demanded. “Go on, get to your next classes.”

I have to hand it to Emerson, he obeyed Brock’s instruction. The bullying not only stopped, but if he happened to glance at Clay, or me for that matter, he quickly looked away.

The weekend after Brock’s intervention for Clay, I went to his house to thank him. He was loading fishing gear into his pickup truck when I arrived. He humbly shrugged off my appreciation, and invited me to join him fishing.

I had a great time! But more for the conversation than the fishing. We talked about all manner of life, but ironically, what we talked the most about was God. At that time Brock was embracing an atheistic viewpoint. There were two things I said that made the gears of his brain churn. First, I asked him what prodded him to do the right thing, if not the Spirit of God?

A little later he challenged. “If God is real, call him down to join us right now, and I’ll believe you.”

“Obviously I can’t do that,” I replied.

“See, I told you that you can’t prove God exists.”

“But you can’t prove that he doesn’t.”

Brock narrowed his eyes and nodded. Then he asked, “What about all the evil in the world? If God is good, why doesn’t he put a stop to it and create a perfect world?”

“Bible prophecy tells us that He will do just that in the future. Right now we live in a fallen world that needs saving, and we do that through God’s Son, Jesus Christ. Brock, we live in a world that murdered God when chose to walk among us. If you don’t like how cruel this world is, your beef is with the prince of this fallen world, Satan, not the Creator.”

When Brock made a joke by quoting Acts 26:28, I knew he had at least read some of the Bible. He told me in old English vernacular. “Almost thou persuadest me to be a Christian.”

I laughed, but would have been more pleased if he had quoted something the Apostle Paul said, rather than King Agrippa.

Although I had a great time, I left Brock that day feeling troubled. My crush on my own cousin was transforming into falling in love. I knew it was impossible, yet I couldn’t help the way I felt. I told myself it would pass, and that Brock surely didn’t have reciprocal feelings for me.

Yet a couple weeks later, he invited me to go fishing with him again. We sort of became occasional fishing buddies over the next couple years. I was not a late bloomer, and during the summer of 2003, I tried to make the most of it. Brock was twenty, while I was seventeen. I wore a bikini top and short shorts. Although I noticed Brock noticing me, he never invited me to go fishing alone with him again.

July fourth, 2004, found Brock, our cousin Six Sallie, and me out fishing together. Six had brought a cooler of beer. I thought Brock didn’t drink, so I was surprised when he took one from Six. Then to my surprise, Six handed one to me, and I drank it. I had never had alcohol before that day, and so far, have never touched it since.

One led to two, two to three, and three to four. Somebody called at Six from the lakeshore. The next thing I knew, Six was gone, and Brock and I were alone. I don’t know how many beers he had, but I perceived we were on the same page with our desires. When we relaunched from the shore, Brock maneuvered the little fishing boat to a secluded spot.

But rather than seducing me, which I had secretly hoped, he cast his line and leaned back in his seat, relaxing. So I devised a plan to seduce him. I cast my line, but rather than lean back in my seat, I laid out a beach towel. There was just enough room on the small boat to lay down.

“Will you let me know if I have a bite?” I asked Brock.

“How come?”

“I’m gonna catch some sun on my back side.”

“Alright.”

I laid down on my stomach, reached to my back and untied my bikini top. After a few minutes, I heard Brock pop a beer open. I abruptly turned and asked, “What was that?”

Brock had been staring lustfully at me, and in surprise, choked on the beer he was swallowing. “What was what?”

“Oh, it must have been you opening your can.”

“Hailey, put your top back on!”

“Why, do you think I’m ugly?” I asked with a playful pout.

“No, no, not at all, as a matter of fact, you, um… Never mind.”

“I what?”

“Never mind.”

I grabbed my top and quickly put it back on. The alcohol must have made me get overly dramatic, emotional, and manipulative. I started to cry. “You do think I’m ugly.”

“Are you kidding?” Brock asked, going to one knee in front of me and taking a hand. “You look in mirrors, you know that you’re drop dead gorgeous.”

“I am?” I replied, giving him wide, vulnerable eyes. “So what’s the problem?”

“What’s the problem?” he said, snorting a sarcastic laugh. “I’m in a boat with my almost naked cousin, who looks like she just walked out of a Playboy magazine.”

“And that’s a problem?” I asked with a sultry smile.

“Yeah, I’d say having inappropriate thoughts about your cousin is a problem.”

“Maybe the thoughts need to become reality,” I said, and kissed him.

I don’t know how long we kissed. It was at least two minutes, but no longer then ten, when another boat entered the little nook where we were floating. We quickly separated with me grabbing my pole and Brock starting the little engine, taking us to shore.

“Look, Hailey, we better stop hanging out together,” Brock said with a sad smile.

“Why?” I tried not to whine.

“Because I’m falling in love with my cousin.”

“You are?”

“I’m ashamed to admit it, but yes.”

“But I’m in love with you, too. We can make it work.”

“Hailey, we’re cousins! We have the same grandpa and grandma!”

Brock, voicing the reality, caused me to feel ashamed. I nodded and bowed my head.

“I think both of us drinking caused us to lose control,” Brock said. “Let’s go get a cup of coffee.”

We had a nice talk over coffee, but it was bittersweet. I was relieved to find out that we both felt the same about each other, but frustrated we couldn’t be with each other due to our relation. Although we parted on good terms, Brock and I never really talked again. We saw each other a half a dozen times at weddings and funerals, but only exchanged brief small talk.

When I first found evidence that Hal Storm wasn’t my biological father, my first thought was of Brock, and what if? When my mother confirmed my suspicions, I wanted to lash out at her and tell her what the lie of omission cost me, but I didn’t.

I know that I would have wanted a relationship with Brock if I knew the truth, but I didn’t know about Brock. After all, we were still cousins, just not by blood. I had to muster up the courage to ask him in person.

(DESTINY’S BIBLE STUDY NOTES AND QUOTES)

(The LIFE and MINISTRY of JESUS #28)

The first true evangelists (See Matthew 10, Mark: 7-11, Luke 9:1-6)

The apostles had listened to Jesus’s discourses, they had walked and talked with the Son of God, and from His daily instruction they had learned how to work for the elevation of humanity.

During His ministry Jesus devoted more time to healing the sick than to preaching. Wherever Jesus went, the tidings of His mercy preceded Him.

The followers of Christ are to labor as He did. We are to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, and comfort the suffering and afflicted. We are to minister to the despairing, and inspire hope in the hopeless.

God’s servants are to contend with supernatural forces, but they are assured supernatural help. Our infirmities may be many, our sins, and mistakes grievous; but the grace of God is for all who seek it with contrition. The power of Omnipotence is enlisted in behalf of those who trust in God.

Jesus fearlessly denounced hypocrisy, unbelief, and iniquity, but tears were in His voice as He uttered His scathing rebukes. He wept over Jerusalem, the city He loved, that refused to receive Him, the Way, the Truth, and the Life. They rejected Him, the Savior, but He regarded them with pitying tenderness, and sorrow so deep that it broke His heart.

Every soul was precious in Jesus’s eyes. While He always bore Himself with divine dignity, He bowed with tenderest regard to every member of the family of God. In all humanity He saw souls whom it was His mission to save.

The servants of God are to overcome evil by the power of Christ. The glory of Christ is their strength. They are to fix their eyes upon His loveliness. Let them rest in the love of God, and the spirit will be kept calm, even under personal abuse. The Lord will clothe them with a divine panoply.

God is dishonored and the gospel is betrayed when His servants depend on the counsel of men who are not under the guidance of the Holy Spirit. Worldly wisdom is foolishness with God.

Jesus Himself never purchased peace with compromise.

It is Satan’s work to men’s hearts with doubt. He leads them to look upon God as a stern judge. He tempts them to sin, and then to regard themselves as too vile to approach their heavenly Father or to excite His pity. The Lord understands all this. Jesus assures His disciples of God’s sympathy for them in their needs and weaknesses. Not a sigh is breathed, not a pain felt, not a grief pierces the soul, but the throb vibrates to the Father’s heart.

God is bending from His throne to hear the cry of the oppressed. To every sincere prayer He answers, “Here am I.” He uplifts the distressed and downtrodden. In all our afflictions He is afflicted. In every temptation and every trial the angel of His presence is near to deliver.

A daily, earnest striving to know God, and Jesus Christ whom He sent, would bring power and efficiency to the soul.

TRICKY TRIANGLE

CHAPTER 14

Summer 1996

The child grew, becoming strong in spirit with the grace of God. She had love for Jesus  in her. Hailey May Storm was a happy, healthy, and obedient little girl. After her parents, the people she loved the most were her Uncle Eddie, her two brothers, and her niece, April Storm.

Her niece, being one month older than Hailey, became her best friend growing up. Her Uncle Eddie was like a third parent, even though he wasn’t actually her blood uncle. He was the fun one. He never told her it was time for bed or to clean her room. No, he showered her with gifts and rarely missed an event she participated in. What she didn’t know was that Uncle Eddie was her biological father.

Hailey was a mini me of her mother with the exception of her coloring. Dawn had dark brown hair sprinkled with white, and brown eyes. Dawn’s husband Hal had brown hair and hazel eyes. Hailey had blonde hair and blue eyes just like bio dad. Yet if anyone questioned Hailey’s parentage, they kept it to themselves.

There was something about Uncle Eddie that troubled Hailey. There frequently seemed to be a dark pall in his demeanor. Yet whenever they greeted each other or said goodbye, his smile was like a beam of sunlight breaking out of a gloomy day.

Their relationship was such that when Hailey went to Uncle Ed’s house across the street, she entered without knocking. One afternoon when she was ten, she discover him sleeping on the sofa. Only it wasn’t a peaceful sleep. He was trembling, moaning, groaning, and then grunting. Hailey perceived it was a nightmare and proceeded to gently wake him.

Before Hailey realized what was happening, Ed reared off the couch, grabbed Hailey’s shoulder, and hurled his fist at her face. She emitted a blood curdling shriek, and Ed’s knuckles stopped just an inch from her nose.

He stared at her dumfounded, releasing his grip on her shoulder. She rubbed the tender spot, gazing at him with a frightened expression. Beads of sweat bubbled on his forehead. His lower lip trembled and his eyes seemed to be electrified in their sockets. “Oh Hailey, my little girl, I… I’m so sorry. I… I thought you were an intruder, or something.”

Hailey wondered at him calling her his little girl, and it would resonate with her for years. Uncle Eddie usually called her Angel. Maybe little girl wasn’t that much different from being called his angel, yet it was. Little girl felt sort of like being called his daughter, and she knew she wasn’t an angel, even though she tried to be good.

With trembling fingers, Ed lit a cigarette. Hailey knew he smoked, but he rarely smoked in front of her, and never inside. He took a drag. As he blew out the smoke, he looked at Hailey, then at the cigarette, and then quickly snuffed it out. Clearly Uncle Eddie wasn’t himself. He must have been having a very bad nightmare. Hailey had had bad dreams before, but Uncle Eddie’s dream must have been beyond bad on an otherwise pleasant afternoon.

“Were you having a bad dream?” Hailey asked gently.

“I guess I was,” Ed said, and then forced a chuckle.

“I have bad dreams sometimes,” she acknowledged.

“Yes, Angel, I guess everyone does.”

“Yours seemed exceptionally bad.”

Eddie grinned at her use the word exceptionally. She often used big words now. His little girl was growing up, becoming as smart as a whip. “I suppose so.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” Ed said abruptly, then regretted how sharp it sounded. He smiled. “I’m used to bad dreams, Honey.”

“How come?”

Ed shrugged. “I’ve had them quite a bit.”

“Mom says it’s good to talk to someone you trust when something troubles you.”

“Yeah,” he nodded, and looked away from her earnest gaze. “It’s just there’s some things a guy doesn’t want to talk about.”

“Don’t you trust me?”

“Sure I do, Angel. It’s just… well…”

“Just what?” She asked softly, taking his hands in hers.

He marveled at how wholesome and pure she was, despite being conceived in sin. She was plain, yet pretty, just like her mother. Her eyes were shaped like Dawn’s, but the color was his. He loved her as much, if not more than Wendy. But that’s comparing apples with oranges.

Wendy was his lover, his soulmate, his wife. Taken from him way too soon. But this young vibrant girl, his daughter, was bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh. To her, he was Uncle Eddie. But to him, she was everything.

Something was happening that he dreaded, but was powerless to stop. Tears welled, and then dribbled out of his eyes. Hailey’s own eyes filled with tears, and her countenance was pure love. She croaked, “Please talk to me, Daddy.”

Ed felt as if he had been jabbed by an electric prod. Did she just call him Daddy?

“Did you just call me Daddy?”

“I guess so… Sorry.”

“No need to apologize. But why did you call me that?”

She shrugged because she didn’t know why herself. She tucked a strand of cornsilk hair behind an ear. “I guess because I’m concerned about you, and you called me your little girl.”

“I did, when?”

“Right after you realized I wasn’t an intruder.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“No need to apologize,” Hailey giggled, and then said shyly. “You sort of, um, well, seem like a second father to me. You’ve played such a huge roll in my life, too. More than most uncles, and you aren’t even my, um, blood uncle. But I love you so much, Uncle Eddie.”

Eddie squeezed both of her hands, then pulled one away to pinch the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes. He was so overcome with emotion. For so long he had battled PTSD alone. Only Wendy had known about his nightmares, but he never talked about them. They usually were kept at bay when he slept in shifts. No more than a couple hours sleep at a time. But with this afternoon nap that Hailey walked in on, he was having one in full force.

“I love you too, Angel,” he told her, his head still bowed, his eyes still clamped shut. He knew if he looked at her, he’d start bawling again.

“I understand if you don’t want to talk to me about your nightmares,” Hailey said gently. “It’s just, I want to understand your pain, and be there for you.”

“Thank you,” he croaked, looking at her, and opening his arms for a hug.

“Dad said you were in the Vietnam war,” Hailey said as their hug separated.

“That’s right.”

“Is that what your bad dreams are about?”

“Mostly.”

“Dad said you came home from the war early because you were injured.”

“Not much early, but yeah.”

“Is that what you dream about, how you got injured?”

“Sort of,” he nodded. He had a lot of bad war memories, but that day he earned a purple heart was the worst. Not because of his own injury, but because of the buddy killed right in front of him.

“Can you tell me what happened?” she asked softly.

“Our patrol walked into an ambush,” Ed heard himself say quietly. Why was he talking about this? He had never told anyone, not even Wendy! His wife, who had soothed many a flashback with her love and gentleness. Why was he telling this young girl, his lovely daughter. She was too young to hear of something so horrific. Yet she was so persistent in such an unobtrusive way.

“Were you shot?” she prodded gently.

“No,” he replied, breathing heavily. “A grenade exploded, and I was hit by some shrapnel in the leg. But that wasn’t the bad part. My buddy right in front of me, Jimmy Lansing.”

Eddie stopped talking and started panting as if he had just been sprinting. He stared intently at the floor in front of him.

“What happened to Jimmy?” Hailey persuaded gently, her young voice like that of his namesake for her, an angel.

In a trance like monotone, Ed answered her. “Right before we went on patrol, Jimmy was telling me that the first thing he was gonna do when his tour was up in just a couple weeks, was propose to his high school sweetheart. He was even writing her a letter to her as he told me. Then we were all told to move out, and Jimmy kissed the letter, saying ‘I’ll talk to you later, sweetheart.’

“Twenty minutes later, as we marched, there was an explosion. At the same time I felt something slam into my leg, Jimmy slammed into me and we fell backwards. His face was gone… There was just a bloody mass of bone and tissue in its place… It was… You can’t imagine…”

Ed felt Hailey’s slender arms go around him, and her cheek next to his. They both felt the moisture of their mingled tears. Ed felt a strange sense of relief at unburdening his soul. On the other hand, he worried that what Hailey’s young mind just heard might scar her.

He gently pushed her away, and gripped both of her shoulders. “Angel, I’m sorry, I should have never told you that. I don’t know why I…”

“Oh Uncle Eddie, don’t be,” Hailey told him, as she placed her soft hand on his cheek. “After all, I’m the one that talked you into it. I can’t tell you how honored it makes me feel that you shared that with me.”

Ed shrugged and nodded. An awkward silence ensued before Hailey asked. “Did you ever contact Jimmy’s girlfriend?”

“I did, when I was first discharged,” Ed said. “I felt I owed it to Jimmy. He basically died in my place. If he hadn’t been walking right in front of me, it would have been my head and chest that was ripped away. To be honest, and this is selfish, I’ve often thought he got the better end of the deal. He never knew what hit him, but I’ve known for the last thirty years.”

“Uncle Eddie, you can find peace in God,” Hailey said softly.

“Can I?” he snorted sarcastically. “Where has He been all these years then?”

“He’s right here, but He doesn’t force Himself on anyone. Revelation 3:20 tells us He knocks on the door of our hearts, but it’s up to us to let Him in.”

Ed forced a smile, and nodded. If it was anyone else, he would have spewed sarcasm.

“Can I pray with you, Uncle Eddie?”

If it was anyone else, he would have said no. But he smiled and nodded. Hailey knelt in front of him and took her hands in his. As she prayed, something stirred in Ed. All his doubts, all his cynicism, all his guilt. And why the guilt if he didn’t believe in God?

This angel right in front of him was the best evidence of God working in his life. And yet she was a product of his worst guilt by sleeping with his best friend’s wife. The only guilt that outweighed that was surviving the war when so many others didn’t. He left his own thoughts and tuned into what she was saying.

“As bad as that was, Father,” he heard Hailey saying. “We know that you can relate to our sufferings, and are always there for us. You sweat great drops of blood in anguish over the sins of the world. You suffered the most horrible of all deaths on the cross, and you would have done it for us personally, if we were the only person, the only sinner on the planet…”

Ed was suddenly returned to the thoughts and feelings of his youth when he had felt close to God. This young girl’s words broke through his barrier and made him realize that Jesus was the only hope, the only light in this dark world, in his dark world.

Hailey was momentarily disappointed when she felt Ed rise from the sofa. Then she was elated when she discovered him kneeling in reverence with her. She was thrilled when Uncle Ed himself spoke up himself and asked God back into his life. She felt humbled when he thanked God for her, calling her his angel.

“You’re quite the little counselor,” Ed said when they rose from their knees. He ruffled her hair with his hand.

“Thanks,” she replied with a quick shrug and a shy smile.

“You ought to be a psychiatrist or psychologist,” he said with a chuckle. “Dr. Hailey May Storm.”

“Maybe,” she giggled, turning shyly away from his proud gaze.

Later, after she left, Ed anxiously pulled a cigarette from the pack and lit it. It felt like a cat was clawing at the inside of his chest. He took a deep drag, and then he had an intense round of smoker’s cough. When he pulled his hand away from covering his mouth, there were sprinkles of blood. Again.

(DESTINY’S BIBLE STUDY NOTES AND QUOTES)

(The LIFE and MINISTRY of JESUS #27)

The Touch of Faith (See Matthew 9:18-26, Mark 5:21-43, Luke 8:40-56)

Jairus, an elder of the Jews came to Jesus in great distress, and cast himself at his feet.

Jesus set out at once with the ruler for his home. Though the disciples had seen so many of His works of mercy, they were surprised at His compliance with the entreaty of the haughty rabbi. Yet they accompanied their Master, and the people followed, eager and expectant.

The ruler’s house was not very far, but Jesus and His companions advanced slowly, for the crowd pressed Him on every side. The anxious father was impatient of delay. But Jesus, pitying the people, stopped now and then to relieve some suffering one, or to comfort a troubled heart.

Jairus pressed closer to the Savior, and together they hurried to the ruler’s home. Jesus requiring everyone to leave the house, took with Him the father and mother of the young girl. He also took the three disciples, Peter, James, and John. Together, they entered the chamber of death.

Jesus approached the bedside, and taking the child’s hand in His own, He said, “Damsel, I say unto you, arise.”

On the way to the ruler’s house, there was a poor woman in the crowd who for 12 years had suffered from a disease that made her life a burden. She had spent all her money on physicians and remedies, only to be pronounced incurable. But her hopes revived when she heard of the cures that Christ performed.

She said to herself as he was passing. “If I can just touch the hem of His garment, I will be made whole.”

In the moment she touched it, she knew that she was healed. In that one touch was consecrated the faith of her life, and instantly her pain and feebleness gave place to the vigor of perfect health.

The Savior could distinguish the touch of faith from the casual contact of the careless throng.

It was not simply through the outward contact with Him, but through the faith which took hold on His divine power, that the cure was wrought.

In spiritual things, to talk of religion in a casual way, and to pray without soul hunger and living faith avails nothing. The faith that is unto salvation is not a mere intellectual ascent to the truth. It is not enough to believe about Christ; we must believe in Him!

The only faith that will benefit us is that which embraces Him as a personal Savior, which appropriates His merits to ourselves. Many hold faith as an opinion. Saving faith is a transaction by which those who receive Christ join themselves in covenant relation with God. Genuine faith is life. A living faith means an increase of vigor, a confiding trust, by which the soul becomes a conquering power.

Every individual has a life distinct from all others, and an experience differing essentially from theirs. God desires that our praise shall ascend to Him, marked by our own individuality.

TRICKY TRIANGLE

CHAPTER 13

MAY 1986 to MAY 1987

“Oh, hey Dawn,” Ed said into the telephone. “What’s going on?”

“Oh, not much,” Dawn replied. Ed could tell her voice sounded strained. “Just having a baby?”

“Oh my! Are you and Hal at the hospital?”

“No, I’m at home, and Hal’s fishing with some guys from work.”

“Fishing in this storm?”

“It was sunny when he left.”

“But the baby isn’t due for a couple weeks.”

“Tell that to our daughter.”

Dawn calling the baby “our daughter” caused Ed to pause and relish the inclusiveness.

“Look, are you coming to take me to the hospital? Or what!” Dawn barked.

“I’m on my way,” Ed replied. “I’ll be there in less than ten.”

Hal was too late to see his wife’s daughter arrive into the world. But the man who impregnated her wasn’t. Ed sat on Dawn’s bed and grinned at the baby he had made with his best friend’s wife. His arm rested on the pillow just above her head. Dawn’s hair was still matted with sweat as she smiled lovingly at her little girl.

Once again, Hal had caught his best friend in bed with his wife. The pair hadn’t spotted him peeking through the doorway, and he stood still watching them. In a strange way, he felt more jealous now than he did the morning he discovered them in bed together, not long after this child was conceived.

“Did you and Hal decide what you are gonna name her?” He heard Ed ask.

“We were thinking about Jennifer, after my mother, and June for her middle name,” Dawn replied. “But seeing how it was hailing when I waited for you to pick me up, I want to name her Hailey. Hailey May, since she didn’t come in June as expected. As long as Hal agrees.”

“Hailey Storm, born right after a hailstorm,” Ed chuckled. “How fitting, I don’t see why he wouldn’t agree.”

Their words made him feel included, and also helped him resist fighting the green eyed monster. He took hold of the camera around his neck, aiming it at Dawn, Ed, and baby Hailey. He snapped off a shot, the click and the flash bulb causing them to look. Ed hopped off of the bed as if caught doing something inappropriate. Dawn smiled happily, although wearily, at her husband.

“Sit back down, Ed,” Hal said as he went to the other side of the bed. Both men sat down at the same time, and then Hal kissed his wife.

“Isn’t she beautiful?” Ed said.

“They both are,” Hal replied. “Sorry I wasn’t here.”

“She did come a bit early,” Dawn said. “Thankfully, Eddie was available.”

“Yes,” Hal responded reluctantly, yet with a smile. “There must be something about  stormy weather that makes babies come early.”

A nurse came in and checked on baby and mother. Before she left, Hal asked her to take a picture of the three of them. She wore a puzzled frown as she complied, and Hal thought about saying sarcastically that both he and Ed were the baby’s fathers.

In the weeks following Hailey’s birth, Uncle Ed didn’t miss a day coming over to see his daughter. There were times Hal regretted being so accepting of his wife’s one time paramour. But after weeks turned to months, the duel fathering began to seem normal. Hal learned to not only accept, but enjoy Ed’s role in their daughter’s life.

Then nine months after Hailey was born, a house directly across the street from the Storm residence came up for sale, and Ed bought it. Hal, feeling this was too close for comfort, had renewed feelings of an intruder in their family. Ed, a former detective, perceived his friend’s feelings and kept his distance for a time. But then Hal, catching Ed having a cigarette on his backyard deck, changed everything.

“Hey, what are you doing?” Hal scolded in a joking manner. “I thought you quit before Hailey was born?”

Ed chuckled, took one more drag, and dropped the cigarette into an empty beer bottle. “I did.”

“So I see.”

“I really did for almost a year. But about a week ago, I just, I don’t know…”

“You don’t know what?”

“Anymore, I just feel like a fifth wheel when I’m over at your house. I mean, I love Hailey to pieces, but she’s also a reminder of my sin and how I’ve been an interloper in your marriage. Yet you’ve handled it with class, dignity, and Christian charity.”

Hal felt sorry for his friend, yet he also felt encouraged by his mention of sin and Christian charity. Ever since Ed returned from Vietnam, he had expressed an attitude of atheism. “So that’s why you haven’t been around for the last several days?”

Ed shrugged and lit another cigarette.

“Eddie, I wouldn’t be here right now if I thought you were an interloper. You’re not just some random guy that seduced my wife. You guys had a bond over Wendy. Before your, as you called it, sin, I was witnessing Dawn become infatuated with erotic novels, drinking wine, and dressing sexy. Even knowing this, I stood by and let her get close to you.”

“That’s my point,” Ed said. “You’d have reason not to trust some random guy your wife started hanging out with. But me, you should have been able to trust.”

“Some random guy wouldn’t be showing the contrition that you have, and are right now.”

Ed took a drag from his cigarette, letting the smoke tumble out of his mouth as he talked. “I appreciate your sentiment, but still… Let me ask you something. If it had been some random guy instead of me, would you have still forgiven Dawn?”

“Yes.”

“What about him?”

Hal sighed. “Eddie, I don’t like hypotheticals. How can I know if I’d forgive a fictional guy over fictional circumstances.”

“Fair point.”

“But another point is that I love both you and Dawn. That helped with not only forgiving, but going forward.”

“I love you too, man,” Ed said with a croak. Hal gave him a light punch on the shoulder. Then both men felt awkward with the emotion of the moment.

“I feel like we’re in a sappy commercial or something,” Hal said, and they both laughed. Then Hal continued. “Does it bother you being Uncle Eddie, instead of Daddy?”

“Yes and no,” Ed replied. “I mean, of course, I’d like her to know me as dad. But I also want to abide by Dawn’s wishes in keeping Hailey’s parentage a secret. I completely understand why she would be embarrassed. Shoot, I don’t even want it known that I slept with my best friend’s wife.”

Hal had a brief flashback of seeing his wife in bed with Ed, their clothes strewn about the floor, and the sleezy smell of alcohol and stale cigarette smoke. “Look, Eddie, I’ve never been a rearview mirror type of guy. I believe in not only looking forward, but moving forward.”

“That’s just it,” Ed said. “It’s hard to move forward when… Because I…”

“Because you what?”

“I have a confession.”

“Yeah?”

“I love Dawn.”

“I know, I loved Wendy.”

“Yeah,” Ed said, sighed, and then winced. “But you didn’t have a baby by Wendy.”

Hal didn’t feel any resentment because he felt truly bad for his friend for loving a woman he couldn’t have. He had always felt a strange satisfaction sharing his wife with his close friend after he lost Wendy. It seemed like such a contradiction with his occasional bouts of jealousy.  “Is that what’s been keeping you away then?”

“I don’t know,” Ed sighed, pulling out another cigarette.

“Slow down, man!” Hal barked.

“Huh?”

“What, are you trying to make up for lost time after not smoking for a year?”

Ed snorted a laugh and slid the cigarette back in the pack. “Habits man, you do them without thinking. I’m not gonna lie, I missed smoking last year.”

“It’s not healthy to desire things we shouldn’t have,” Hal told him.

Ed wondered if he had a double meaning with his statement. Hal instantly realized that it could have sounded like he meant his wife with his words. “Why don’t you come over for supper tonight, you’ll set Dawn’s mind at ease. Remember, we’re moving forward. Little Hailey makes us all family.”

“Alright,” Ed said, forcing a smile. He truly appreciated Hal’s generosity and loved him for it. On the other hand, upon saying it made them all family, Ed felt like replying sarcastically that he was gonna be Uncle Eddie to his own daughter.

Why were there so many yins and yang’s in life? That day and night with Dawn was amazing, especially when they unintentionally made a baby. Then the aftermath of guilt was awful and still lingered. Yet Hailey was beautiful, a miracle, despite being conceived in sin. He had to be in her life, no matter what the role. He would be the best uncle that ever existed.

“Great, I’ll let Dawn know you’re coming. See ya at six.”

“I’ll be there, and thanks Hal. I can’t imagine having a better friend.”

Hal slapped his back and walked away. As soon as he was out of sight, Ed pulled a cigarette from the pack. He might not be able to have the woman he desired, but what about a habit he desired. He lit the coffin nail, took a long drag, and inhaled deeply.

(DESTINY’S BIBLE STUDY NOTES AND QUOTES)

(The LIFE and MINISTRY of JESUS #26)

Peace Be Still (See Matthew 8:23-34, Mark 4:35-41 and 5:1-20, Luke 8:22-39)

Absorbed in their efforts to save themselves, the disciples had forgotten that Jesus was on board.

In Jesus was their only hope. In their helplessness and despair they cried, “Master, Master!” The dense darkness hid Him from their sight. Suddenly a flash of lightning pierces the darkness, and they see Jesus lying asleep, undisturbed by the tumult.

“Lord save us, we perish!” Never did a soul utter that cry unheeded.

When Jesus was awakened to meet the storm, he was in perfect peace. There was no trace of fear in word or look, for no fear was in His heart.

As Jesus rested in His Father’s care, so we are to rest in the care of our Savior.

How often the disciples experience is ours. When the tempest of temptation gather, and the fierce lightnings flash, and the waves sweep over us, we battle with the storm alone, forgetting there is One who can help us. We trust to our own strength till our hope is lost, and we are ready to perish.

But if we have the Savior in our hearts, there is no need of fear. Living faith in the Redeemer will smooth the sea of life, and will deliver us from danger in the way that He knows is best.

The people of Gergesa had before them the living evidence of Christ’s power and mercy. They saw the men who had been restored to reason; but they were so fearful of endangering their earthly interests that He who had vanquished the prince of darkness before their eyes was treated as an intruder, and the Gift of heaven was turned from their doors.

It is in working to spread the good news of salvation that we are brought near to the Savior.

The encounter with the demoniacs at Gergesa had a lesson for the disciples. It showed the depths of degradation to which Satan is seeking to drag the whole human race, and the mission of Christ to set men free from his power.

Satan’s influence is constantly exerted upon men to distract the senses, control the mind for evil, and incite to violence and crime. He weakens the body, darkens the intellect, and debases the soul.

Before humanity and angels Satan has been revealed as man’s enemy and destroyer. Christ, as man’s friend and deliverer. His spirit will develop in people all that will ennoble the character and dignify the nature.

The only safeguard against Satan’s power  is found in the presence of Jesus.

TRICKY TRIANGLE

CHAPTER 12

APRIL 1986

“Did you tell him?” Dawn asked her husband Hal as he slowly walked into their bedroom. His hands were in his pockets as he stroked his chin thoughtfully, wearing both a puzzled frown and a smirk.

“No,” Hal replied quietly. Since Dawn had been putting off for weeks telling their close friend that he was going to be a father, Hal agreed to do it. But once on the phone with Ed, he didn’t do it.

“Oh, and why’s that?” she inquired, calmly, yet curiously.

“A couple reasons,” Hal said. He then slowly pulled a hand out of his pocket, scratched his head, and put his hand back in his pocket. Then he stared at an empty chair as if it was fascinating.

“Okay,” Dawn drawled slowly. “Are you gonna tell me?”

“It sounds like he’s in love,” Hal chuckled.

“What!” Dawn replied, feeling a jolt of excitement and then a strange twist of jealousy. But why? She and Ed had made a terrible mistake, and it would never happen again. Her  marriage with Hal was moving forward nicely, despite her now carrying Ed’s daughter. Her envy must be for her deceased friend Wendy, or simply a sense protectiveness for  Ed. “You said a couple reasons?”

“Yeah, he’s coming back in a couple weeks for a visit,” Hal explained. “I figured the news that he was going to have a daughter would be better told in person.”

“I suppose you’re right,” Dawn replied as she put away laundry into their dresser. Hal came up behind her and pulled her into a spoon embrace. He kissed her neck, gently rubbing her stomach.

Dawn noticed that the more advanced she became with her pregnancy, the more loving her husband had become. He seemed to be truly excited with the prospect of a daughter, even though she wasn’t biologically his. She just hoped that Ed’s reaction didn’t throw a wrench in it somehow.

“You said Ed is coming back for a visit. Is he not staying for the summer?” Dawn inquired.

“That’s right.”

“So, this woman he’s in love with. Is she keeping him in Arizona?”

“Apparently.”

“Is she coming with on the visit?”

“Yeah.”

“Well that’s gonna make telling him he’s gonna be a father by his best friend’s wife a little difficult,” Dawn spewed,but instantly regretted it. She turned and looked at Hal. “Sorry.”

“For what?”

“You know, mentioning that Ed’s the, um, sperm donor.”

Hal smiled. “Honey, I’m well aware of how you got in this condition.”

“You mean fat,” she joked as she looped her arms around Hal’s neck.

“No, I mean sexy with child,” he laughed before kissing her passionately.

Dawn marveled that her husband seemed more amorous than ever. She was feeling like a cow, but Hal couldn’t seem to take his hands off of her. Better than the other way around. Yet she wondered if his extra attention had more to do with insecurity, and claiming his territory rather than genuine attraction. Regardless, she let the rest of the laundry wait, and let her husband have his way with her.

Two weeks later, Dawn and Hal picked up Ed and his new girlfriend at the airport. Dawn and Hal were both surprised at the resemblance Nicole, Ed’s girlfriend, bore to his deceased wife. She was a tall voluptuous redhead who could have easily passed for Wendy’s sister.

After grins, introductions, and hugs were exchanged, Ed’s smile faded as he couldn’t help stealing glances at Dawn’s midsection. But he wasn’t going to ask. She clearly looked pregnant, but he had once witnessed Wendy asking a woman when she was due. They were both mortified when the woman declared that she wasn’t expecting.

“Just so you know,” Dawn said with a coy smile. “I haven’t been drinking lots of Budweiser, I’m pregnant.”

“Wow, really?” Ed said in amazement. But he hadn’t been a detective by mistake. However, he didn’t know what to say. When Hal watched his friend staring dumbfounded at his wife’s midsection, he realized that it was a huge mistake to have not told him beforehand.

“We’re gonna have a little girl,” Dawn declared as she looped an arm through Hal’s. Yet she looked Ed right in the eyes when she said it.

“You don’t say,” Ed said as he forced a smile. “I’m guessing it was unplanned?”

“Completely,” Dawn replied. “But Hal and I are excited. And that’s not all.”

“Oh?”

“We’re gonna be grandparents, too,” Dawn added.

“Congratulations,” Ed said, and then stammered. “I mean, for both.”

“The weird thing is, our granddaughter is due before our daughter.”

“You don’t say,” Ed chuckled.

The foursome drove to the Strom residence, and the guests were set up in a spare bedroom. Before Hal ordered pizza for dinner, Ed took his old friend aside. He scratched his head and had an awkward expression. “Say Hal… Did you have your vasectomy reversed?”

“Come on, Ed,” Hal chuckled. “You know better than that.”

“So I’m…?”

“Yes, you’re the baby’s father.”

“Hal, I don’t know what to say,” Ed replied, looking a bit bewildered. “Are we good?”

Hal remembered Ed asking this same thing in the aftermath of his fling with his wife. “We are.”

Ed ran a hand through his dark blonde hair. “I wish you’d have told me sooner.”

“I was leaving it up to Dawn to tell you,” Hal said with a shrug. “She kept procrastinating.”

After dinner, the two couples chatted for over an hour. Then Nicole declared weariness from travel and went to bed. Hal, his whole adult life nurturing a habit of early to bed and early to rise, turned in. This left Dawn, Ed, and their unborn daughter alone.

“May I?” Ed asked with a grin as a hand hovered over Dawn’s stomach.

“Sure,” she replied with a smile and a shrug.

Ed gently ran his hand over her belly. Then without asking, he pulled up her blouse far enough to expose her midsection and gave his daughter soft kisses. Dawn felt inappropriate sensations that reminded her of the night their baby was conceived. Why was something so pleasurable so wrong?

She placed a hand on the back of his head in an effort to get him to stop, but he miss interpreted the gesture. He raised his head and kissed her. Taken by surprise, she let the lip lock linger. But when he attempted to deepen it, Dawn pushed him away. “Eddie, what are you doing?”

“I’m sorry,” he said, smiling sheepishly. “It’s just, well, you’ve never looked more beautiful.”

Dawn smiled, placing her hand on his cheek.

“I love you, Dawn,” Ed told her.

“I love you too, Eddie,” Dawn replied. “But I also love Hal, and he’s who I’m married to. And what made this baby could have easily cost me that marriage. But Hal has a big, forgiving heart, and he forgave not just me, but both of us.”

“I know,” Ed said, sighed, then chuckled. “I love him as much as I love you.”

“Then tomorrow, I want to see you give his belly soft kisses,” Dawn said and laughed. “Then kiss him on the mouth.”

Ed winced and scratched his head. “Look, I love Hal as much, but not the same exact way, I suppose.”

Dawn laughed. “Speaking of Hal, he suggested that you’re in love with Nicole.

“I guess.”

“You guess? Isn’t being in love something you should know?”

“Ah, me lass,” Ed said with an Irish accent. “Who knoweth or understandeth the human heart?”

“Not I, lad,” Dawn replied with her own Irish accent.

“What do you think of Nicole?”

“I think she looks an awful lot like Wendy.”

“What’s wrong with that?”

“Nothing, but she certainly doesn’t have Wendy’s personality.”

“I suppose that’s why I said ‘I guess’ over the question of love.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, over the last couple of weeks it started going the other way. It was actually this trip that turned our relationship around.”

“How long have you two been seeing each other?”

“Since November.”

“How did you meet?”

“She runs an art gallery. As you know, Wendy loved art, was an artist, as well as an art teacher. So I was perusing Nicole’s gallery, and we got to talking. She was impressed with my knowledge of art, and I was impressed with her legs, chest, long red hair, and pretty face.”

Dawn smirked. “I notice you mentioned face last.”

“Last but not least.”

“So tell me why your relationship is doing an about face.”

Ed shrugged. “I was pretty smitten with her the first couple months. I mean, I did think she was a little snooty, but… Anyway, when I suggested this trip back to Minnesota, she didn’t really want to go, but I talked her into it. Ever since, she hasn’t seemed to hold back.”

“Hold back what?”

“Nagging, and just being a cold, all-around witch.”

“That’s too bad.”

“I’ve actually been kind of hoping she’d break up with me,” Ed said with a chuckle. Then he gave Dawn’s belly a little pat. “But now I have a good reason to move back here permanently.”

Dawn inwardly cringed. “I know you still need time to get your head around our baby. But do you have an idea of how involved you want to be in your daughter’s life?”

“Very involved,” Ed replied. Then he noticed a pained look on Dawn’s face as she chewed on her lower lip. “Why, how involved do you want me to be?”

“Very involved,” Dawn said, touching his arm and wincing. “But more in the role of an uncle.”

“So, you want the parentage to remain a secret.”

“I’d like everyone to assume that Hal’s the biological father.”

“Isn’t that dishonest?”

“What makes it dishonest? When our boys inquired about me getting pregnant after all these years, I basically told them it was an opps. Which it was. Hal and I never ever talked about our sex life in front of them, so what’s wrong with letting them assume he’s the father? My sex life is my business, and private, period.”

“Fair point.”

“Am I being fair though? To you?”

“Absolutely,” Ed said, taking her hand in his. “I want what you want. I fully understand I’m not your husband, and I had no business impregnating you in the first place. So I’m just grateful to be Uncle Eddie.”

“Thank you,” Dawn smiled, then leaned in and hugged him. She jolted when the phone rang. Then a wave of anxiety flashed through her when she saw it was a quarter past eleven. Who could be calling at this hour? It couldn’t be good. “Hello?”

“Hi, Grandma,” her son said cheerfully into her ear.

She felt relieved that his tone was so upbeat, thinking there must not be anything wrong. She laughed. “Now don’t be calling me a grandma just yet.”

“Why not?” David chuckled. “I’m holding your granddaughter as we speak. She decided to come a couple weeks early.”

“You’re kidding!”

“I’m not. April Lilly Storm was born a half hour ago. She’s slightly underweight, but otherwise healthy with powerful little lungs.”

Dawn felt her eyes well with gratitude. “April Storm. It has been thundering and lightning tonight, too.”

Suddenly the baby in Dawn’s womb gave her the hardest kick to date. This caused Dawn to recall Luke chapter 1:41, when John the Baptist leapt in Elizabeth’s womb upon hearing the greeting from Mary, who carried baby Jesus in her womb. Dawn whispered a thank you to the Lord for a healthy baby grandchild, grinning from ear to ear as she wiped at a tear.

(DESTINY’S BIBLE STUDY NOTES AND QUOTES)

(The LIFE and MINISTRY of JESUS Part 25)

“Come unto Me, all you that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28.

The heaviest burden that we bear is sin. If we were left to bear this burden, it would crush us. But the Sinless One has taken our place. “The Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all.” Isaiah 53:6.

He is watching over you! Are you tempted, He will deliver. Are you weak? He will strengthen. Are you ignorant? He will enlighten. Are you wounded? He will heal. “He tells the number of the stars;” and yet, “He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds.” Psalm 147:4, and 3.

Whatever your anxieties and trials, spread out your case before the Lord. Your spirit will be braced for endurance. The way will be opened for you to disentangle yourself from embarrassment or difficulty. The weaker and more helpless you know yourself to be, the stronger you will become in His strength.

Jesus tells us how His rest is to be found. “Take My yoke upon you,” He says. The yoke is an instrument of service. Cattle were yoked for labor, and the yoke is essential that they may labor effectually. We are to take upon us His yoke, that we may be co-workers with Him.

The yoke that binds to service is the law of God.

Those who accept the one principle of making the service and honor of God supreme will find perplexities vanish, and a plain path before their feet.

Worry is blind and cannot discern the future, but Jesus sees the end from the beginning.

Redemption is that process by which the soul is trained for heaven. This training means a knowledge of Christ.

In the heart of Christ, where reigned perfect harmony with God, there was perfect peace. He was never elated by applause, nor dejected by censure or disappointment. Amid the greatest opposition and the most cruel treatment, He was still of good courage.

But many who profess to be His followers have an anxious, troubled heart, because they are afraid to trust themselves with God. They do not make a complete surrender to Him. They shrink from the consequences that such a surrender may involve. Unless they do make this surrender, they cannot find peace.

Those who take Christ at His word and surrender their souls to His keeping, their lives to His ordering, will find peace and quietude. Nothing of the world can make them sad when Jesus makes them glad by His presence.

“You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in you.” Isaiah 26:3

As through Jesus we enter into rest, heaven begins here. We respond to His invitation, Come, learn of Me, and in thus coming we begin the life eternal.

Heaven is a ceaseless approaching to God through Christ.

TRICKY TRIANGLE

CHAPTER 11

FEBRUARY 1986

“When are you gonna tell Eddie that he’s gonna be a father?” Hal asked his wife.

Dawn looked startled. “Why do I have to tell him?”

“Who else? Surely you don’t expect me too?”

“Why does he have to know?”

Hal laughed, but there was no humor in it. “Dawn, he’s a close friend of ours. He’s gonna find out sooner or later that you’re either with child or had a child.”

Dawn’s eyes looked sad and pleading. “I know I don’t deserve it. But I was hoping you would claim the child is yours.”

“Honey, Eddie knows I’ve had a vasectomy. He’s gonna put two and two together.”

“Yeah, but the rest of the world doesn’t know.”

“But that’s a lie. I don’t want to live a lie.”

“So, you’re not gonna help me raise her?” Dawn asked with a stern expression as she folded her arms.

“Of course I am,” Hal replied, and then he frowned. “You know you’re gonna have a girl?”

Dawn shrugged a shoulder. “No, not for sure, just a hunch. Anyway, if you’re gonna raise her, you are her father, even if the sperm wasn’t… You know… .”

Hal pursed his lips and nodded. “Look, I will let people assume I’m the dad, but we still need to let Eddie know he’s gonna be a father. Then if he wants to go along with your wish, fine. But also, if he wants to be part of the child’s life, he has every right.”

“Does he? What right did he have having sex with a married woman?”

Hal snorted. “You let him.”

Dawn’s jaw clenched, and Hal could see tears welling. “So now you’re reneging on that night being your fault too?”

“No,” Hal said with a sigh, closing his eyes and put a hand on his forehead.

“Now my blood pressure is spiking right before my doctor’s appointment,” Dawn groaned.

“I’m sorry,” Hal said, sighed again, and looked at his watch. “We better go.”

An hour later Dawn had a dreamy look on her face as she and Hal exited the doctor’s office. She linked her arm with her husband’s. “We’re gonna have a baby girl, Hal.”

Hal was thrilled that she said we, not I, and grinned. “I guess you were right.”

“About what?”

“You said you had a feeling it was a girl.”

Dawn giggled, shrugged, and hung onto Hal’s arm a little tighter. Hal had been worried that Dawn would end up with postpartum depression worse than with David and Luke. Between her age and manner in which she conceived, he felt the outlook for her mental health was bleak.

But now he could see that his wife was excited about the prospect of having a daughter. He remembered when they were expecting David, and he picked up on clues that Dawn hoped for a girl. Then with Luke, she actually bought some girl’s clothes before he was born. Hal often wondered if the unfulfilled desire for a daughter contributed to Dawn’s struggle with depression.

As Hal pulled the car out of the doctor’s parking lot, he felt joyful with the contented smile on his wife’s face. Her getting a daughter might be a difference maker in what was sure to be a complicated situation. It pained him that he wasn’t the biological father. However, that actually made him the more determined to raise their girl as his own.

Hal’s grin then left his face when he realized that right now was the best time to broach a subject they’ve been avoiding. “You know, it’s probably time we should let the boys know that they’re gonna have a sister.”

Now the smile also left Dawn’s face, and she gave Hal a startled look before she asked. “You’ll claim to be the father, right?”

“Listen, Dawn, I’m fine with letting people assume I’m your baby’s father. But are you asking me to lie if someone happens to press the question on us?”

“No,” she replied sullenly. Hal thought for a second she was going to give him a pouty lip. “But if the boys don’t press it, who will? They don’t know you’ve had a vasectomy, do they?”

“I never told them, so I don’t know how they could.”

“Good, so the only person that knows is Eddie. And what better person to be the only one?”

“That’s another thing though, Dawn. This will be Eddie’s only child, what if he wants to be involved in her life? What if he wants joint custody? We won’t be able to hide her real parentage then.”

“I believe he will honor my wishes.”

“I hope so, but who knows the human heart?”

“It’s deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked, who can know it?” Dawn added with a coy smile. “But he loves me, and he’ll want what’s best for our little girl as well as our marriage. He will understand that you appearing to be the father will allow her to grow up without the stigma of, you know…”

Her words, “he loves me” and “our little girl,” were like a slap in the face from the green eyed monster. But Hal shook it off. “I believe you’re right. I was just cautioning that you never know about people.”

Now Dawn felt a sting of guilt by her husband’s words of never knowing about people. She never thought she would ever be an adulterous woman, but she was with her growing abdomen as one of the consequences. Hal also probably thought his best friend would never go to bed with his wife, but he did. What would her boys think of her if they knew the truth?

“Will you contact David and invite him to dinner tonight?”

“Sure.”

When Hal got off the phone with their son, she asked why he was frowning.

“Dave sounded nervous, saying he has something he needs to talk to us about,” Hal replied. “He said he had been putting it off, and he wanted to talk to you and me alone. He said he would tell his brother right after he talked to us in private. I told him Luke wouldn’t be home from basketball practice until five thirty, and asked if he could come early. He said he’ll be here by five.”

Dawn felt a wave of anxiety pass through, and she put a hand on her stomach. Did David have a serious illness? Was he gonna drop out of college? Was he in legal trouble? Was he gonna come out as gay? He had been awful secretive about his love life since he graduated high school.

At five on the nose, Dawn, Hal, and their oldest son took seats at the kitchen table. Dave twisted a drinking straw in his fingers when he blurted. “My girlfriend is pregnant, and were gonna get married in April.”

Dawn and Hal stared at their son with gaping mouths. Dawn now suspected who and was horrified. Hal composed himself first. “And who’s your girlfriend?”

Dave glanced at his mother. “Angie Ferguson.”

Now the protective mother surfaced, and Dawn tried not to sound stern when she asked. “So, do you have to wait until April so her divorce can be finalized?”

“Mom, it’s not what you think.”

“Oh, and what do I think?”

“You probably think Angie is a loose woman, or something. Well, she’s not!”

“David, I like Angie, and I realize she’s had bad luck with men, but…”

“But what?” David asked disgruntled, and he abruptly folded his arms.

“Who’s Angie?” Hal asked with a frown.

“She works at the department store,” Dawn replied.

Three years earlier, Dawn got David a part time job at the store where she was employed. He continued working there as he went to community college, pursing an A.A. in business. Then he had planned on a university and a bachelor’s degree.

“Her dad owns the store,” David added in an attempt to put his girlfriend in a good light.

“And what does he think about this?” Dawn asked.

“He doesn’t know.”

“How could he not? I could tell for the last couple weeks that she was with child. I assumed she got back with her husband. I had no clue that you put her in that condition. I mean, I knew you two were chummy and all. But for goodness sakes, she’s thirty-two years old and going through a second divorce. You just turned twenty.”

“Three months ago.”

“Oh, three months ago?” Dawn added sarcastically. “I guess it’s not that big of an age gap then after all.”

Dawn glanced at her husband, and then did a double take. His expression looked more forlorn than when he had picked her up at Eddie’s after her night of debauchery and adultery.

“Look,” David explained. “Angie married her high school sweetheart just a month after they graduated. Within the first year, she discovered he was cheating on her with her best friend. I mean, can you imagine that?”

Hal noticed Dawn’s eyes looked startled, and then she simply bowed her head and nodded.

“Then her current husband leads her on about starting a family when they were dating,” David continued. “Then after a year of not being able to conceive, she gets checked out and is perfectly, um, fertile, I guess. So she tries to get her husband to get checked. He puts it off, and puts it off. She keeps pressing, and he finally confesses that he has had a vasectomy, and actually doesn’t want any more kids.”

Dawn and Hal both looked at each other, both wondering what the other is thinking.

The discussion continued. Dawn and Hal questioned their son about college. They brought up adoption as an option. They suggested he didn’t have to get married just because she was pregnant, but he could still support her. How did he know the child was his anyway?

After dinner when Dawn and Hal informed both of their sons that they were gonna have a sister, Dawn felt like a hypocrite. When the question of pregnancy after seventeen years came up, Dawn just said it was an accident, that she didn’t think she could still get pregnant and had become careless.

“You know, Angie and I are having a baby girl, too,” David said happily.

“Really, a little girl?” Dawn asked pleasantly. “You never said when the due date was.”

“You never asked.”

Dawn pursed her lips in exasperation. “Well, I’m asking now.”

“May fourth,” David replied. “How about my sister?”

“June twenty-third,” Dawn answered.

“How about that!” Luke laughed. “I’ll have a niece before I have a sister.”

“Yeah, you guys, how about that?” David chuckled. “You’ll be grandparents before you’re parents again.”

Dawn and Hal looked at each other. Dawn looked stunned and speechless. Hal smiled weakly. “Yeah, how about that?”

(DESTINY’S BIBLE STUDY NOTES AND QUOTES)

(The LIFE and MINISTRY of JESUS Part 24)

(See Matthew 12:22-50 Mark 3:20-35)

Whatever the sin, if the soul repents and believes, the guilt is washed away in the blood of Christ. But he who rejects the work of the Holy Spirit is placing himself where repentance and faith cannot come to him.

It is by the Spirit that God works upon the heart. When men willfully reject the Spirit, and even declare it to be from Satan, they cut off the channel by which God can communicate with them.

It is not God that blinds the eyes of men or hardens their hearts. He sends them light to correct their errors, and to lead them in safe paths. It is by rejection of this light that the eyes are blinded and the heart hardened.

Often the process is gradual, and almost imperceptible. Light comes to the soul through God’s word, through His servants, or by the direct agency of His Spirit. But when one ray of light is disregarded, there is a partial benumbing of the spiritual perceptions, and the second revealing of light is less clearly discerned. So the darkness increases, until it is night in the soul.

People are influenced by their own words. Often under a momentary impulse, prompted by Satan, they give utterance to jealousy or evil surmising, expressing that which they do not really believe. But the expression reacts on the thoughts.

It is not only by resistance, but by neglect that the soul is destroyed.

When the soul surrenders itself to Christ, a new power takes possession of the new heart. A change is wrought which a person can never accomplish for themselves. It is a supernatural work, bringing a supernatural element into human nature.

It is not necessary for us deliberately to choose the service of the kingdom of darkness in order to come under its dominion. We have only to neglect to ally ourselves with the kingdom of light.

The only defense against evil is the indwelling of Christ in the heart through faith in His righteousness.

Unless we become vitally connected with God, we can never resist the unhallowed effects of self-love, self-indulgence, and temptation to sin. We may leave off many bad habits, but without a vital connection with God, through the surrender of ourselves to Him moment by moment, we shall be overcome.

Without a personal acquaintance with Christ, and a continual communion, we are at the mercy of the enemy, and shall do his bidding in the end.

Jesus’s brothers often saw Him full of grief; but instead of comforting Him, their spirit and words only wounded His heart. His sensitive nature was tortured, His motives were misunderstood, His work was uncomprehended.

His brothers presumed to think that they could teach Him who understood all truth, and comprehended all mysteries. They avowed faith in God, and thought they were vindicating God, when God was with them in the flesh, and they knew Him not.

There were none on earth who could comprehend His divine mission, or know the burden which He bore on behalf of humanity. Often He could find relief only in being alone, and communing with His heavenly Father.

Christ loves the heavenly beings that surround His throne. But what shall account for the great love wherewith He has loved us? We cannot understand it, but we can know it to be true in our own experience.