CHAPTER 6

BROCK

I just confessed to being a murderer to Destiny! She was stunned, I could see it in her eyes. I was stunned, I could feel it in my body going rigid. Although I was never a spy, my years in high level security had given me some experience with subterfuge. In other words, I had been a professional liar by times. I suppose I borrowed from it now. I aimed a little smile at Destiny. “I should say, I’ve killed in the line duty.”

“I see,” Destiny replied with a smile as her face relaxed.

The duty I spoke of was loyalty to my dead brother. The duty was a personal code I had acted on. I eliminated a guy who was supposed to be a man of God. He had taken advantage of my brother when he was preadolescent. I found out about the man when my sibling was incapacitated with a lingering death.

My act of vengeance on my brother’s behalf had led me down a path of vigilantism. I had researched sex offenders who I had judged got off easy. My employment in high level security gave me access to records beyond internet searches. I became a self-imposed branch of the justice system.

But when I began seeking the Lord, I became convicted that vengeance is God’s, not mine. Regardless of how I viewed the justice system, or lack thereof, I needed to put away my desire to hunt bad guys. I needed to repent of the thrill to kill, and executing judgement. And for the last year I had.

But reuniting with Nora Medora had come back to bite me. She had found out about my illegal activities. As a matter of fact, she had made me aware of her knowledge the previous day. I suppose that’s how I had let down my guard with Destiny, and let that confession of being a killer slip from my lips.

Nora had showed up on my doorstep the day before. She was wearing her usual exercise attire, black spandex shorts a size too small and matching sports bra. Her luscious, light caramel colored skin was slick with sweat. Her dark eyes were intense and angry, but she still wore a sultry smirk. She barged into my house without being invited, but I didn’t try to stop her. To be honest, I felt familiar carnal urges stirring, but I had no intention of acting upon them. I resisted temptation, sort of.

“I know you got my text that I was going for a run this afternoon,” she said coolly.

“And I know I responded by telling you that I wasn’t playing.”

“I thought it was a diversion.”

“It wasn’t.”

“I see,” she said, as if confused. She folded her arms across her chest. “Well, I didn’t drive over one hundred miles just to go for a run.”

We engaged in a stare down for a minute, and then she began to remove her sports bra. My arm shot out to stop her.

“Nora, I told you the other day that we need to stop, um, fornicating.”

“Oh, Brock,” she drawled with a sarcastic voice. “I beg to differ.”

“You beg to differ?” I asked, confused, frustrated, and a little angry.

“You know all those years in Miami when we were just friends with benefits?” she asked using air quotes for ‘friends with benefits.’ “Not once did we actually sleep together. But here in Iowa, because we live a hundred miles apart, and because we are now supposed to be more of a couple, we tend to spend the night with each other. You know, we actually sleep together.”

She used air quotes for sleep. Then she folded her arms and gazed at me like the cat that swallowed the canary. I almost told her I enjoyed it too, but I didn’t want to keep encouraging our habit of fornicating. So I simply shrugged and said, “Okay.”

“Did you know that sometimes you talk in your sleep? You dream about violence sometimes, don’t you, dear?”

A chill ran up my spine and I hoped my expression was neutral. Nora smiled maliciously at me.

“You see, Brock, there’s this possible serial killer on the FBI’s Ten Most Wanted list. There have been twenty-four men shot to death across the country. They suspect that all twenty-four were executed by the same guy. All of them were rapists and or pedophiles. A few of them were priests, and interestingly enough, the very first of the twenty-four served in your family’s parish for several years. How about that?”

“How about that?” I repeated defiantly, even though my blood pressure spiked. I went into combat mode and refused to be intimidated.

“Yeah,” Nora continued, wearing a sly smile. “So I’ve always kept a little journal. I record daily stuff, everything from my cases to when I get my period. Do you know what else I recorded in my journal?”

I gazed at Nora with what I hoped was a cold, hard stare. She took a step toward me and patted me gently on my cheek.

“I jotted down my buddy’s travels,” she said, but used a crude verb to describe what kind of buddies we were. “Did you know that my buddy was in the same area at the same time for almost all of these murders?”

We had a silent stare down for a long minute.

“My seemingly meaningless habit of jotting down where my boyfriend was traveling sure paid off in the end,” she stated gleefully. “I guess you have two choices. You can either start undressing right now, or we can break up and I’ll go to the FBI with my evidence. What’s it gonna be?”

“It looks like you’ll be going to the FBI with your circumstantial evidence,” I told her as fear gripped my spine.

She took a step back with an astonished look on her countenance and crossed her arms.

“You seriously would rather go to prison than have sex with this?” Nora asked as she waved her hands down and up her stunning body. Then she placed her hands on her hips and stared daggers into me.

“I’m surrendering my life to Christ, Nora,” I said softly. “I can’t fornicate anymore.”

“But you can lie?”

“Of course not.”

“So what are you gonna do when the FBI questions you?” she asked with an exasperated laugh.

“I’ll answer their questions truthfully.”

“And end up in prison.”

“So if you have evidence that I’m a serial killer, you’re willing to cover it up if I continue to have a sexual relationship with you?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because I know that all twenty-four men murdered were absolute scum who got off much easier than they deserved.”

“You don’t feel unethical blackmailing me?”

“Are you the killer, then?” she asked with a stern look.

I returned the look but remained silent.

“Answer me.”

“No comment.”

“No comment,” she replied, throwing her hands in the air. “Are you kidding me? You may as well have said yes.”

Nora was right. So I might as well set the record straight. Any fear I had was gone and completely replaced with peace. I needed to trust God and let the chips fall where they may.

“Okay,” I told Nora. “Yes, it’s me. But it has been well over a year since I last killed, and I’ve vowed to God to never to kill again. ‘Vengeance is mine,’ says the Lord.”

Nora looked at me with a stunned expression. Her face softened and she smiled sweetly, yet sinisterly.

“You trust me enough to admit this, even though you’re dumping me?” she asked quietly.

“I love you, and I am not dumping you, Nora. But you’ve been making it pretty clear that you don’t want to get married. And I’ve been procrastinating ending our habit of having sex. I’m done telling myself, just one more time. Then you show up several days later. And I think, just one more time.

“I’m becoming a Christian,  Nora, and I want to live a life of obedience to God’s moral law. I simply can’t fornicate anymore. And given our history, I couldn’t just be your friend and not constantly be tempted.”

“But you’d be willing to marry me?” Nora asked, with a stern gaze.

“Yes, you know that. I’ll marry you right now if you’d be willing.”

“Well, we shouldn’t rush into anything.”

“Rush into anything? We’ve been together almost seven years.”

“Uh, uh, uh,” she uttered, waving a corrective finger at me. “We’ve only been trying the relationship thing a matter of months.”

“Nora, we’ve consummated hundreds of times since we first started seeing each other. And we’ve sort been friends that whole time too.”

“That’s the point! Between our history in Florida and now our current situation in Iowa, I’d say we are already common law married.”

“Okay,” I nodded. “That is a start.”

“Fine, then lets get it on,” she said, taking my hand and pulling me. “How about the shower?”

I tugged back, and she lost her balance. Nora was tough and fiery, but I was still almost twice her weight. “We need to make it legal, and for Pastor to say some words over us.”

Nora swore and put her hands on her hips. “I’ve always liked your macho, manliness in our relationship… I mean situation. But your new religion is making you a wimp.”

I laughed. “Yeah, you’ve always clearly been a lady, haven’t you? Just like most women, you put your guy in choke holds, arm bars, and slug him on occasion.”

“That’s why I need a tough man,” she said as she took a step toward me. Her face was close enough I could feel her warm breath. “You and I are so right for each other. I moved to fly over country for you. Isn’t that a gesture of permanence?”

“You did it for your career.”

“I could have went anywhere in the country.”

Nora looked contrite and vulnerable. I really did love her. I went to one knee and took her hands in mine. “Dayanara Medora, would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”

Nora stared at me with a blank expression.

“You really are serious, aren’t you?” she asked with a mildly stunned expression.

“Yes,” I replied without hesitation.

            She went to one knee herself and looked earnestly into my eyes.

“If I say yes,” she asked so quietly it was almost a whisper, “can we still remain like we are? I mean that I live in Des Moines while you live here.”

“That would be fine.”

“I don’t want kids.”

“That’s fine.”

“And I don’t want to change my name.”

“You don’t need to, even though Storm is a pretty awesome name.”

She chuckled and gazed at me with genuine affection.  

“It is a pretty awesome name,” she agreed. “But Medora goes with Nora pretty slick.”

“It does at that.”

We stared at each other for a minute, strangely shy and goofily. It made her uncomfortable, so she kissed me hard and long. When she deepened the kiss, I tried to push away. She grabbed a couple of my fingers and began bending them in an unnatural position. “Owe!” I bellowed.

“Okay, now it’s time for a compromise,” she said in her cop voice. “Stand up.”

I arose as she still firmly gripped my fingers. The potential for increased pain lingered. If it was an actual threat, I could have kneed her in the mid-section or punched her with my free hand. She let go and demanded. “Now, I said yes to your proposal. That means we intend to marry. So let’s go consummate our engagement.”

“Nora, I said not until we are actually married.”

She sighed heavily, put her hands on her hips. “Brock, Solomon had seven hundred wives. Do you really think he had seven hundred ceremonies or seven hundred signed legal documents?”

She had me there. Plus, she looked hot, in more ways than one, as sweat still continued to bead from her pores. I grinned, shook my head, and kissed her.

Twenty-four hours later, I was sitting at Cotton Creek with Destiny, having just blurted that I’ve killed people. Although she handled it cooly, I could see disturbance in her eyes. She calmly and daintily tucked a strand of honey blonde hair behind an ear. Her beautiful large eyes were as blue as the sky. She was so different than Nora, but every bit as alluring.

Over the last twenty hours, I wasn’t very happy with the person who famously declared that an unexamined life wasn’t worth living. But my anguish over sex and violence proved to be healthy in the end. It was just painful and confusing in the present. A small example was my ‘yes’ to Destiny’s question. Was it a lie?

No, I told myself. It was a step. I had been working for the security firm during every execution I had committed. It was just on my personal time. If Destiny and I were to get closer, I would reveal everything that happened.

What was I thinking? If Destiny and I got closer? I had just proposed marriage to Nora Medora! Not only that, Nora said yes. She also had promised we would tie the knot before the end of the year. I had demanded by the end of summer. She said maybe.

I changed the subject with the lovely Miss Destiny Knight. “Yesterday I asked Nora to marry me.”

To my surprise, her eyes looked more startled than when I confessed to having killed men. Then her lower lip tucked in a little, and her chin crinkled for a second as if she felt like crying. Then she stoically replied, “Oh, you did?”

“Yeah,” I responded, my mind racing.

Was Destiny interested in me? Was I interested in her, despite intending to marry another woman? Did I make a mistake by asking Nora Medora to be my lawfully wedded wife? In the long run, Destiny would be the better choice, due to our similar faith. But Nora not only knew my secret, she was in a position to put me in prison for the rest of my life. But didn’t I deserve it after taking the law into my on hands?

Oh the human condition! I had been sorting out my past as a vigilante killer. In particular, reconciling my previous actions of self-justice with my developing spirituality. At the same time, I was sorting out feelings of love, lust, and infatuation. I longed to live under righteous principles. Nora left me feeling rattled yesterday. Then Destiny gave me mixed messages today.

With a seemingly genuine smile, Destiny extended a hand, “Congratulations.”

I took her hand, and with a mischievous grin, I said, “I didn’t tell you her answer.”

“Oh,” she replied with wide eyes. “I assumed she said yes.”

“She did,” I said with a chuckle. “I was just teasing.”

“I guess my assumption was based off what my own response would have been,” Destiny said cheerfully.

“Your own response?” I asked with a frown. “What does that mean?”

“Just that I would have said yes if you had asked me.”